Schlaf

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TW- ALCOHOL PROBLEMS, EATING DISORDER MENTION, AND SLEEP DEPREVATION (I DONT KNOW IF THAT'S NEEDED).

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WILBUR POV-

I stood there, still not knowing what to say. I couldn't sleep, eat; fucking nothing. What the hell is wrong with me? Why can't I just be a fairly normal person?

I was suddenly pulled from my thoughts as Phil shook my shoulders. 

"Wil, the hell were you doing, mate? I was asking if you could go grab some food from the store," Phil's eyes were laced with worry, but I just ignored that. 

I laughed. "Sorry, I was a little lost in thought to say the least. What do we need while I'm there?"

Phil gave me a small list of food. Most of it just looked like snacks for Techno and Tommy (as well as some random things like tin cans...). I'm honestly not too surprised there. I don't even know how we can still afford food for them. 

I laughed again, and tried to pull myself back into reality. I needed to do what I needed to do. This should be a fairly easy task. I  started out the door, ignoring Phil's protests about walking. I knew if I tried to drive right now, I would probably kill someone, myself included. 

The walk to the store was a long one, but it was calming. I honestly don't remember a vast majority of it, but that's not very important. I walked into the store and quickly grabbed everything I needed. I grabbed a small bottle of vodka knowing that I was going to end up drinking it. 

As I was checking out, no one even asked for an ID. I guessed I just looked that old anyhow; I'm not complaining though. 

I walked out the store and into the alleyway.  I popped open the lid of the vodka and brought it up to my mouth. I took large gulps, knowing this was going to be my only safe place for a while. 

I just kept drinking until the bottle was empty. I felt pretty dizzy, but everything felt really good. My stomach was warm and my head was quiet. I grabbed the groceries off the ground and stumbled my way back home. 

I finally got to the door and tried to force myself to sober up. I straightened my back and closed my mouth. As I walked in the door, I saw no one in the living room or kitchen so I set the bags down on the table and headed up towards to my room. 

Techno popped up in front of me and grunted. "Jesus, what the hell have you been doing Wil?"

I was trying not to speak since my mouth just wasn't working but I didn't have a choice. I brought a finger up to his mouth. "Shhhhh..." I muttered. "I only drank a little. Don't worry about it. Please don't tell Phil. I'll help you with anything you want when I'm sobered up." 

Techno shook his head and grunted. That was basically his way of saying whatever. I stumbled into my room and fell onto my bed. My head was spinning so much but I have to say I was really enjoying it. This is honestly the best I've felt in probably years. 

I was just giggling and staring at the ceiling for what felt like hours. My door opened and I glanced to look over at the door. Of course; it was Phil. It always was. 

Phil looked pretty angry. "Wil... what the hell are you doing?"

I looked over at him trying to keep my eyes focused in the same place. "Mmm? Well, I'm staring at the ceiling." My words slurred together slightly, but I was pretty proud of how well I was keeping them together. 

"Wil, I know what you did. I know you drank a bit. I can smell it from over here. Just, please drink some water and get something to eat. You'll feel like shit later," Phil said, trying to keep his voice low. 

I grunted to him and looked back up the ceiling. It just kept spinning; it was so nice and free. I wish I could be that free. 

Eventually, the drink started to wear off. I never ended up falling asleep. Well shit. That was one of my last hopes. 

I stumbled downstairs with a headache and saw Tubbo and Tommy just chilling on the couch together. They seemed pretty content with whatever they were watching, so hopefully they wouldn't bother me. 

I walked over to the fridge and grabbed a water bottle. God knows I'll be needing this. I walked back into the living room but everything was too loud and just too fucking bright. I grunted again, angry with my hangover, and headed back to my room. I checked the time; 7 pm already. Damn, I was drunk for a fair while. I laughed, impressed with myself. 

I hopped back into my bed and put on some Netflix. I had no idea what I wanted to watch, but hopefully something would end up boring me to sleep. I didn't want to have another sleepless night. 

AN- I'm trying to get back into writing this so bare with me please. Hopefully it'll come together eventually. I hope you enjoyed this short-ish chapter. 

(881 words)