karlnap / dreamnotfound oneshots

karlnap - stay

* * angst & fluff * *
- light starvation
(the italics (example) is memories/the past while normal text (example) is the present. ; )

He slammed the front door behind him, I opened it quickly. "Karl, don't go, please." I begged. "We can fix it, we always do." I ran forward and grabbed his hand.

"No we can't." He turned to look at me, there was fire in his eyes.

"Karl, I-."

"Save it."

I followed him down the driveway. "Please, please don't leave." I begged. "I can't.."

"You can't what, Nick?" I flinched slightly at my name, he never called me that. I just stared at him hopelessly, trying to make him understand with my eyes. He looked like he was going to reach forward and hug me, I hung my arms out toward him. "I'll pick up my stuff on Saturday. I'm going to stay with my dad." He turned around and I winced, like he had stabbed me or something.

"I love you." I called out as he got in his car, wiping the tears off of my cheeks and trying to pull myself together. When he backed out of the driveway I slammed my hand against the door, my salty tears flowing down into my mouth, suddenly and rapidly.

He didn't even say it back.

I woke up slowly, fluttering my eyes open and squeezing the thing I was holding tighter. At first I thought it might have just been a pillow but then all the thoughts came rushing back.

Karl stood in the doorway, I felt like crying at the sight of him. Instead I let him in quietly and walked to the living room, curling myself up in a ball in the corner of the couch, the place I'd been sitting for only a little under a week. I rested my head on the couch cushion and held back my ocean of tears.

"I'm- I'm going now.." Karl said after about fifteen minutes of him being upstairs, packing his stuff up.

My eyes didn't move from the black tv, instead I shifted my foot to get a little more comfortable. "Okay." I whispered, listening to his feet pad down to the front door. "I love you." I said a little louder.

"Sap please don't do this to me." He sounded pain—like he wasn't the one leaving.

I shrugged. "It's okay, Karl." I took in a deep shaky breath, letting it out after a few seconds. "It's okay." I said again, this time more to myself though. "You're okay." This, again, was also to myself because my hands started shaking vigorously.

I closed my eyes and faced up toward the ceiling, listening for the click of the door and Karl's Maserati. Instead of that, though, I got something else. "You aren't eating." He stated and I heard him in the kitchen. "You aren't sleeping." He added, picking up something that crinkled and throwing it away. "Don't do that to yourself."

I opened my eyes, looking down at my shaking hands. "I'm fine."

"You're here." I said quietly, a soft smile playing on my lips.

"I know." He responded.

I reluctantly scooted closer to him, running my thumb across his soft cheek. He took my hand and kissed my thumb.

"You aren't fine."

"I don't want to fight."

He sighed and I felt a hand run through my hair, I shivered. "You know you hurt me." His fingers left my hair.

"I would never hurt you purposely." We were both quiet for a while. "I fucking love you, Karl. I.." I dug my untamed nails into my knee. "I didn't mean to do anything." I wanted to cry into his shoulder and have him wrap his small arms around me and tell me everything was going to be okay. But I ended up just crying into the couch cushion, wrapped in my own arms pathetically, trying to ignore the angry rumble of my stomach. "Please just go." I sobbed, not wanting him to see me in his state.

Arms wrapped around me, making my head spin. I felt like I was going to pass out. "I love you." He kissed my cheek a couple times, something I'd been craving for the last few days. "I'm so sorry. I should've listened to you."

"Stay here for a minute." Karl said, kissing my jaw.

I silently watched him peel himself out of bed and wondered how long he had been up. After about ten minutes I started to worry, had he left? Did I not hear the door? The car? I got up quickly and practically ran downstairs. "Karl?" I asked, rushing around to the bathroom, living room, and spare bedroom. I broke down crying, leaning against the wall behind me.

"I love you." I cried into his shoulder, trying to catch my breath. Karl pulled my head away from him, both hands on either side of my face. "I'm so sorry." I looked at him. "So sorry." I swiped his tears away and leaned my forehead against his. "I don't want you to leave, I don't want to fight."

"I don't either." He wrapped his arms around my neck in a tight hug. We sat together silently, slowly rocking from side to side. When he pulled back we'd both calmed down. "Please stop doing this to yourself." He lifted up my shirt a little, exposing my thinned our stomach. "Honey.." He winced.

"It's okay." I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around him.

"It's not." He ran his hands up and down my sides. "Have you eaten anything?"

I looked off his shoulder, closing my eyes.

"You're tired." He noticed, standing up and holding my hand. "C'mon."

I pulled him back down onto the couch. "I don't need to sleep, I want to make everything better. I want to fix things."

Karl's eyes softened but he shook his head no. "I'm not leaving, I'm not going anywhere. We have all the time in the world."

"Are- are you sure?"

"I promise."

Arms enveloped me and I felt too weak to fight them. "Everything is okay, you're okay, I'm okay, we're okay." Came Karl's soothing voice as a hand ran through my hair.

"We're okay." I repeated, feeling comforted.

I laid down in bed, hugging Karl onto my chest. "I missed you." He whispered, sneaking his hand up my shirt and running it across my abdomen. "I don't ever want to leave again."

Words couldn't explain how loved I felt by him.
Words couldn't explain how miserable I felt without him, either.

"Please." I said helplessly, kissing the top of his head.

"What's wrong?"

"Please be with me."

Karl looked up at me with a grin. "I'm with you."

My lips quirked up into a smile. "I love you."

"I love you too."

* * *
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