You see I told them I told them what abandonment does to me
The pain that it makes me feel
The ache in my heart and my soul, it seems to stay and never go away
They were warned;
They knew about it yet they did it anyway
They did the one thing that I myself couldn't handle
They did the one thing that is near impossible for my body to recover from
And because of that I now sit alone on a cold hard floor with no one around
No one there to give me a hug or a shoulder to cry on
So I turned to the only thing I know
...
Which is pain
The pain of a cold sharp blade running across my skin my arms and my neck
It gives me that small break away from the emotional pain and turns into physical pain
...
Just for a moment,
I feel like I can breathe again that I can see things clearly now
But there's a weakened part of me
Because it will never allow the blade to go as deep as my heart wants it to go
It always stays on the surface,
Delivering a brief amount of sharp pain
But nothing deep enough to fully take the pain away
Tears flow from my eyes not only from the emotional pain
But from the pain I feel as to what I wish to do
...
Thinking about all those it would hurt
A part of me not really caring,
Just wanting to be away from it all
...
And the fear
The fear is what gets to me
Fear of the unknown
...
The disappointment
That I have allowed myself to get to this point
That I can't calm my emotions
...
And for someone like me
The emotions are too strong
They take over your body
And rush through every cell, bone, and organ
It makes me rash
It makes me bold
It chokes me
Until I can't breathe anymore
...
All I want in this moment
Is to cut the pain away
YOU ARE READING
Confessions of an Abstract Artist
PoetryThis novel is a compilation of short original poems written by me! It may get emotional so please don't cry! "If you are reading this story on any other platform other than Wattpad you are very likely to be at risk of a malware attack. If you wish...
