Always and Forever

Failure

He should've regretted doing what he did, but he couldn't. How could he? He had done it to save Starfire's life, how could he ever regret that? Even if when it came down to it Starfire had to save him.
Robin let himself get distracted though, distracted from the mission, distracted from the people he needed to protect. He had a job and he felt like he failed it. He was a hero, and that always came first. That's what he would be lectured about later. He knew that, he should know that.
He sighed heavily, leaning back against the purple chair he used to sit by Starfire's bed. She slept soundly, her unnatural long hair spread messily all over the pillows. He was waiting for her to wake up, some small part of him had to see she was alright. He couldn't just leave her. Not until he could hear her voice.
Robin didn't remember much of what happened, only coming to find Starfire in the blackness then a flash of a brilliant green light. He woke up in Titians tower, all to show for the encounter a  burn mark where Starfire was holding him. He had been careful not to let Starfire see it when she woke up, adorning a black and blue hoodie to cover the bandage around the wound. He was sparing her from guilt, he wouldn't have put that much thought into it if it was anyone else but Starfire had always seen a more gentler side to Robin.
He was impressed. He had always know she was powerful but something like that was something he had never seen from her before. However, he would never tell her how many people died that day. Either from the thing or from her. He didn't want to see who she had become instead there be a reality.
He shouldn't care so much, he thought in that instant, it was part of the job. Like he had been told so many times lately. She should expect that. Being a hero came first to their feelings.
Starfire suddenly set up with a jolt, her hands sparking green for a moment as so did so.
"Robin!" She shouted, looking around in confusion. Robin moved over to sit on her bed, giving her a gentle smile.
She looked at him and sighed in relief, looking down at her hands.
"Are you okay?" He said into the silence.
She nodded solemnly.
"You did it, you stopped it. Whatever it was. It's over." He set a hand on hers.
She looked up at him. She looked confused, lost, she looked scared of what he wasn't exactly sure.
"That thing, it made me feel strange. Like there was no point of going on." She whispered.
"Hopeless." He said. Putting into words the feelings he had often felt, he guessed that's why the blackness didn't effect him. It wasn't new.
"Yes."
"Well it's over now. You stopped it."
"I stopped it. That's what it kept commanding me to do, to stop." She stared back down intensely at her lap, her eyebrows furrowed. With each moment that past, she got even more upset.
"Maybe it's best if you rest for a while." He remarked, standing up from her bed.
"Let it all clear from your system."
"I have only felt a loneliness like that once before Robin." She said. He didn't even know if she heard what he was saying.
"I don't want to be alone Robin."
"Starfire, you are never alone." Robin wasn't really good at the emotional talks but he always tried. Even if lately, he had been thinking it may be a bad idea.
"Do you promise Robin?"
"You will always have me Star." He put on his gentle smile which she received and mimicked back.
"Then I think I will get the rest then."
"Yeah, see you later." Robin started to walk out flickering off the lights as he did so. He turned back to see her settling into her covers. He chuckled lightly to himself. He was really glad he had her too, how could he ever regret it? He had promised to protect her, and he did with everything he had. How could that be so wrong?

——————
"Robin, I know you care for her but you have responsibility's. You can't let your feelings get in the way of that." The man in the dark suit on screen said. Robin set in the chair across from all the large screens, but he couldn't stand to look at Batman. Not for one moment.
"I know you've told me, but this is different. She can take care of herself, they all can." He was trying to reason more for himself than for Batman.
"They doesn't matter if they distract you Robin."
Robin knew exactly what he was going to say, their phone calls had been a repeat of this one conversation for the last few months.
"We are heroes first, people last. There is no time to be more, and I need to know you know that before you can come back to Gotham City. I need to know I can trust you to make the right choices. To make the hard choices." Batman lectured.
"I promised I would protect her. I can't just forget about that, not after what happened."
"Robin, sometimes we have to reevaluate our promises especially if they are self fulfilling. You have to live with it."
Robin knew he was right, Starfire was more than capable at handling herself. She had proven that hundreds of times. She was smart, resourceful, and all the while she cared  deeply. All qualities that made him respect her immensely, but he couldn't let that happen again. He just couldn't.
"People died today. How am I supposed to live with that?" Robin said with a sigh.
"You know the answer to that question. It was the first thing I taught you"
"You just have to." Robin quoted. "For the greater good."
"I want to be able to trust you, I want to know you can handle this Robin. Prove it to me."
Robin ended the call. It didn't really matter when he did, the two weren't much for heartwarming goodbyes or really goodbyes at all.
Robin knew he was right, he had to be, he always was. Robin could think of nothing more he wanted than to prove himself to him, and he would. He would go back to Gotham City and be the partner Batman always envisioned him being. He had to, it's all he ever wanted. He thought about Starfire then, about how much he would miss her when he left. How much he would miss all of them. He quickly put it out of his mind. Robin walked to the training room, ignoring it all. The pain that ran along his body, his turmoil, Batman, and the lingering thought of Starfire that was always there.