Situationship || Shawmila [Completed]

5. Something real

It was lightly raining that afternoon when someone knocked on Shawn's door. He should have been surprised because he wasn't expecting anyone, but he knew very well who was on the other side of the wooden board. He could recognize her even by the simple sound of her movements. He debated on faking not to be home, but it was time he sucked it up and faced his best friend and wife. God, it still felt weird to say it.

When he opened the door, Camila greeted him with a tight smile that didn't quite reached her eyes. «Hi» she said in a tiny voice, that made him feel bad for making her feel that way. She looked so cautious and insecure. «Can I come in?»

Nodding, he stepped aside and welcomed her inside his home. The place was moderately spacious for a bachelor apartment in Toronto. He rented it right after graduating even if his parents begged him to go back home to live closer to them. He loved them and missed them, and a huge part of him wanted to go back to his little town, but he had so much more opportunities living in the city so, brokenhearted, he chose to stay in Toronto.

He guided Camila to his living room and gestured her to take a seat. «So, what brings you here?». Damn, what a stupid question.

Camila bit the inside of her cheek nervously. «I think you know why I showed up» she said calmly. Yes, calmly, even if everything inside her was shaking and screaming. She hated how she felt in his presence. It was the first time since they met that they were facing a problem. Sure, it happened once or twice that they fought, but it was some meaningless bickering that they solved in less than five minutes. This time though, she felt like a thick cover of ice had descended over them and froze them in a time where everything was awkward and uneasy.

She saw him brush his fingers through his hair, a tic he had when he was nervous. «Yeah, maybe I have an idea or two»

Camila clutched her hands together on her lap, and lifting her gaze to Shawn, she asked: «What are we doing?» Her question sounded weary, pained almost. «We're supposed to be best friends, to be each other supporters, instead we're acting like strangers»

«Camila... I don't know what to say» he admitted, defeated.

«I know I have hurt you, and I'm sorry about it»

Shawn tried to play it cool, but he wasn't a great actor. When it came to his soul, he was an open book. «I don't know what you're talking about»

«Last week, I talked about this... arrangement like it was some trash I had to get rid of. I was angry and confused, and I let my emotions get the best of me, but I made a big deal out of it. I didn't consider how you were feeling and how the things I was saying were affecting you». She got closer to him on the sofa and grabbed his hand. «You are not a problem, this marriage is not a problem. I'm just a drama queen that sometimes needs to be shushed»

«You can't say this is not a problem, Mila» he mumbled. «You are clearly upset by it and we can't force it on our lives like it's just one of our stupid games. This is official, we're husband and wife, but at the same time we aren't and this is jeopardizing our friendship»

«But we'll figure things out, Shawn. I just want my friend back». Her voice quivered and her pupils glassed with unshed tears.

Shawn's heart clenched. «Come here». He pulled her on his lap and hugged her close to his chest, laying his head on hers and feeling revitalized by her proximity. «I've missed you too»

«What's our next move, Shawn?» she whispered with uncertainty. She really hoped he could come up with one of his ingenious idea to solve her problem like he had always do, but he remained silent.

In the meanwhile, his brain was juggling and clanking. Suddenly a thought pushed its way on the surface of his mind. In his head everything made sense, but the moment he turned it into words, he knew he had probably suggested the dumbest and most chaotic solution he could have come up with. «What if we start to think of this marriage as something real?»

Camila widened her eyes and tilted her head. «What?»

He cleared his throat. «I'm not saying we have to be all lovely dovely and so on» he quickly rectified. «But hear me out. We start slowly, like for example with living together -»

«Living together is going slow for you?!»

«Well, normally no! But what do you suggest? Going straight to the kissing part? Dating? Sorry, but it feels too weird to date you!»

She glared at him crossing her arms on her chest. «Not nice dude»

He rolled his eyes. «There's nothing wrong with you, I've just never thought about you in that specific way, that's all»

Camila sighed. «Okay, we share the same apartment and then what? »

«Then we learn to act like a real couple. We sleep on the same bed, we eat together, we go grocery-shopping together, we talk about our days, share secrets and insecurities... things like that»

«We already do all that stuff»

«That's why it should be easy!» he countered back. «Maybe in a couple of months we'll realize there could be something more, or maybe we'll simply end up getting a divorce like we initially planned».

This was the most absurd, dumbest idea she had ever heard. At the same time, she was also living the most absurd, dumbest experience of her life, so what if Shawn's plan worked? At this point they had nothing to lose but a marriage. «Okay, let's try this out» she finally agreed. «Where should we go living?»

Her husband pointed the ambience around them. «Here?» he shrugged. «It's new, I don't have all of my stuff here yet so it shouldn't be hard finding some place for your things. And I also don't want to live with your roommate. That girl is crazy and too much loud in everything she does. I'm not going to put up with her»

Camila laughed and took his face in her hands. Looking him in his eyes and moving a stray curl from his forehead, she whispered «Okay, then. I'll move here». Then she laid a kiss on his cheek, very close to the corner of his mouth, a kissed that lingered for longer than usual and that made both of their hearts racing.