Fill My Naked Empty Space | Book 2

Simula

Simula

I thought my life was at its peak when Kaizer and I did a very life-changing thing that I know our family will cannot accept. So as the people around us, our friends...and the society. Our love for each other was taboo and prohibited by God's words and in the law of humans.

But now that we are separated, I can't think of how my life transformed into something I never believe at first but I get to understand as I should be.

Nandito ako ngayon sa loob ng aking silid habang nag-eempake ng aking mga damit. I know now the truth. I'm not an Arcoiris. And that truth breaks my whole being as it shivered my soul in my entire belief that I'm one of them.

Pagkatapos ng dinner na iyon kasama sila Enzo ay halos nakatulala ako sa biyahe pag-uwi. Naglalayag ang aking utak sa isiping maaring totoo ang sinasabi niya. Ayaw ko mang paniwalaan iyon ay utak at puso ko na mismo ang nagsasabi sa akin. That they might be saying the truth.

My father is Jessiah Arcoiris. He is and only him. Not Ned Gutierrez nor anybody else because my mom Everleigh is faithful to my dad. Kaya alam kong imposible iyong sinasabi sa akin ng tatay nila Enzo. I'm not a Gutierrez. I'm an Arcoiris. I am born as an Arcoiris.

"Anak...p-paano mong-"

I cutted my mom's words. She looked stunned at what I just blurted out. Her eyes were weary while her tears were stuck at the bottom lid of her eyes.

"Mom, tell me the truth. Am I an Arcoiris or not?!"

"Neil Irish! Watch your mouth and don't you ever raised your voice at your mom! Hindi kita pinalaking bastos kaya iayos mo 'yang asal mo!" It was my Dad's thunderous voice that struck me.

Mainit ang likuran ng aking namimilog na mga mata nang hinarap ko si Dad. Diretso siyang nakatayo sa kanang gilid sa harapan ko habang ang mga mata ay parang matalim na punyal na nakatutok sa akin. Nasa salas kami ng bahay at hindi ko na napigilan pa ang sarili kong kumprontahin sila tungkol sa nalaman ko pagkauwi.

Gusto ko munang sarilihin ang mga nalaman ko dahil alam kong walang katotohanan iyon. Ayaw kong paniwalaan. But then it bothered me since then to the point that my ego craves for the truth.

"Dad, sabihin mo sa akin. A-Are you my real father?" My voice trembled as my lips formed in grim when I asked him that.

Nagtiim bagang siya. Nakita ko kung paanong bahagyang mamilog ang kaniyang mga mata sa gulat dahil sa tanong ko. Si Mom naman ay humahagulgol sa gilid ni Dad na ngayon ay mukhang naestatwa sa kaniyang kinatatayuan.

Napalunok ako. I gritted my teeth then shook my head at them again. My heart heaves while I breathe hardly due to the burden rock that is now alighted my chest.

Napaiwas sa akin ng tingin si Dad.

"Dad, tell me the truth. Hindi mo ba ako tunay na-"

"You are my son, Neil Irish!" Namumula niyang sigaw sa akin.

The veins on his neck were visible when he answered me that. It was boisterous. His voice is trying to get keen on me that I only just get to shook my head.

Halos mabingi ako sa naging pagsagot niya sa akin. I wanted to believe what he said but there is deep inside me knew and feel that he's gloss over the fact.

Umiling ako sa kaniya.

"You are my son, Neil. For goodness sake! How'd come you asked me this?" Dad frustratedly asked on me.

I didn't blink. Ramdam ko ang mainit na luhang nagbabadya sa pagbuhos mula sa aking mga mata. Hindi ako nag-iwas o nagababa ng tingin kay Dad. He's lying and I can see it through his eyes.