Oh. My. God.
If you're in the dark, I HOPE you fuckin' HOPE you want to find a LIGHT SWITCH. Some kind of light switch!
Don't you?
Don't you Hope to find the friggin' darkness has an ending that is within your control, and Quick? Don't you?
And brother! Let me tell you! Satin darkness was my friend. You'd have been PROUD! I got creative and I got quick. So quick! You'd have been jealous...you should be jealous!
She didn't make a sound. Blessed silence. Not a sound! I SWEAR!
And then. OMG! That WILD CARD ticket friggin' PAID OFF! I am SUPER BOWL BOUND, baby! And no one to tell me I can't go.
Life is good.
To be there...not to make you jealous or wish you'd have the brass cojones to do what I did between cold ones, but to be there, actually simplifying and freeing my life of daily AGONY...I wouldn't trade it in for ANYTHING.
WELL, ok...One thing...I WOULD trade it in for knocking her up! Being a stupid horny 16 year old punk who didn't know any better and wanted pussy more than air! THAT would be worth giving up! But , since I know nothing about time travel, I'm happy with my lot! I got to go to the Super Bowl with my team!
Yup! Life is good because I am FREE!
IF YOU think I'm an immature grown ass man and you'd like to give me a piece of your mind, I have one thing to offer you in condolence and empathy..."You can Bite me, Bitch!"
