You put a bullet in my heart

38• confronting him

May 14, 2017

After texting with my girls, I got a tad bit fired up. i swear on everything if this man has been playing me... I don't know what I'll do. He is too fine to cheat on me. I grabbed my keys and ran out of my house. I was speeding like 30 over the speed limit to get to his house. Thank goodness I didn't get a speeding ticket. I arrived at chris house, and knocked aggressively on his front door. He opened it probably 2 seconds later.

chris: you look stunning

: Yeah. Sooo i came here to ask you something... And forgive me for this, but i'm going to be very blunt right now.

c: okay, what is it?

: who is amanda riley???

at this point i changed my tone and face to be extremely condescending trying to confront him.

c: what do you mean?

: christopher, do not try me right now, because you know exactly what i mean

c: i'm just confused, why are you asking me that?

: yes or no, do you know who she is?

c: i mean yeah i do...

: okay great. how did y'all meet?

c: what is this about dylan?

: well let me just show you what she dm'd me and maybe that will clear shit up.

i unlock my phone, open instagram and show him the messages between amanda and I. he reads them while maintaining this confused look on his face.

: now do not lie to me. how did y'all meet? I need the date, time, place, every single detail,

c: we met like 6 years ago at this party. She was a friend of a friend kind of. i'm just confused on why she would message you. Why did you even reply to her?

: chris. stop. you follow the bitch back that's why! be for real right now okay?

c: I am being for real, you're asking me all these questions like I did something,

: Well maybe you did do something chris, and that's why I'm asking you. I can't just not know things about you, or question things about you and then not ask you. Like for instance the girl said that the reason you and Jenny broke up was because of me, Is that true?

c: Our breakup was never about you! I have no idea what she's talking about. We argued a lot about anything and everything. She hated the way the media portrayed her and our relationship. She also said I was too emotionally draining for her.

: I mean she wasn't lying.

C: Sure I admit it I'm a lot, but I'm not going to apologize for my feelings. And when mackie dared me to kiss you, there was a piece of me that got too excited and forgot for a moment that I had a girlfriend. For just one moment. In that moment I was only thinking about you and that was a problem at the time. But you knew that Dylan. So that kiss ignited me to talk with jenny but it wasn't the reason we broke up. At that time I was so confused by everything and I didn't have time to process it all.

: for a grown man, you sure do get confused a lot. So tell me this, if we're ever fighting, would you forget that we are dating??

c: No! I would never! I don't know what else to say Dylan! I feel like I'm saying all the wrong things.

: Wait a damn minute, Rewind for a second. Mackie told me y'all were broken up when you kissed me, and you just said that y'all were still dating so who is the fucking liar???!

C: Wellll- I- Mackie I think exaggerated the truth because he didn't want you to feel weird I guess. Jenny and I broke up like a day after the party and I told him about it right after it happened. I had no idea he told you that.

: What the fuck Chris!

C: You weren't mad about it before, and plus why did you ask Mackie and not me?!

: That's not the point!

Silence filled the air.

: Did you cheat on me with amanda? Because she is making it seem like y'all talk every day and are so freaking close,

c: no! i would never cheat dylan! You want the whole truth, fine! i swear on everything i've only slept with her two times in my whole life. and this was before jenny and i even dated. but i told her i didn't want a serious relationship and then started dating jenny, so she was hurt and was saying that i'm the only person that makes her feel happy and that she doesn't leave her house, i felt bad. i just didn't want to immediately stop talking to her, but it's nothing romantic at all! i swear dylan! i love you so much! i would never,

: i hope you know like you should not be having daily conversations that I don't know about with some other girl that I have never met! it's common sense!

c: I understand that! But that is completely irrelevant right now because she comes to me about stuff and I just give her advice that's it! It's not like I'm seeking her out and continuing the conversation or anything.

: irrelevant?! oh wow, just wow. So what do you and amanda talk about specifically? If you didnt continue the conversation then she wouldn't keep texting you!

c: Idk, her problems in life, i mean mostly just giving her advice like i said. here you can look in my phone!

: Just you giving her advice?? that's not a good enough reason to keep talking to another girl that you used to hook up with!! you made me love you and then i find this shit out! i have trust issues chris! you knew this! you are lying about little shit and i didn't know, what else are you keeping from me?? what are you?? like a fucking compulsive liar!?? uhhh!! i am so pissed right now!

C: This is ridiculous Dylan, what are you truly mad about?? You're going on about extra shit,

: I'm mad that you were talking to another girl and I didn't know about it also why are you not seeing that this is a problem??? Like you're breaking my trust right now,

C: I haven't done anything to break your trust Dylan and you know that!

: What are you talking about? You party and get drunk every weekend and I don't say shit, because I trust you but this... This is something bigger okay? And the fact that you don't see how you were wrong in this is concerning,

C: Well I've never lied to you about anything, I truly don't want to hear this-

: You know what, Fuck you! learn to be honest with those around you and hell even be honest with yourself! you're a liar and i don't fuck with liars!!holding the truth from me is still lying. you say that you're all about great communication and pull this shit?!

C: I'm trying to explain and you're twisting my words-

: explain everything to my ass because your gonna need to kiss it to fix this. actually i don't want to deal with you! we are done chris, don't talk or text me

c: w-wait! dylan wait! don't say that! This whole argument is completely ridiculous!

: look at me, we are breaking up. i am breaking up with you. You had plenty of time to come to me about this, but no you didn't. Now lay in a bed of your own consequences. Bye Chris,

I said as I turned around and strutted out his house. i cannot believe that he would keep this much of himself a secret and expect me to be okay with it. absolutely not. especially after everything i went through with rome flynn. i know better now. fuck him for life.