The Soldier

5.The state of confusion

What just happened?? I questioned myself.

"Sorry, I couldn't stop myself from kissing you" Tae said. And he waited for my reaction.

I couldn't say anything and at that moment, I really wanted to kiss him back. But, I stopped for some reason and told him "it's getting late, you better go now" and bid him good night.

I turned to go inside the building and I knew Tae was still standing at the entrance. He was about to go and I ran to him and gave a peck on his cheeks and said " Bye. Take care" And went inside.

I left Taehyung in an utter confused state . At that moment, I, myself was very confused than him. I didn't know why I did that. I had mixed emotions.

Tae had to pass by Mrs. Park's house and she saw him as she came to lock the entrance door and wandered what is he doing here at this time?

That night I couldn't sleep. I was just thinking about the beautiful evening I spent with Taehyung. I was feeling happy and worried at the same time. Because of certain person who kissed me all of a sudden. And, kept on thinking why he did it?

Next day.

I was going to school bit earlier than the usual time. Mrs. Park saw me and invited me to have breakfast with her. Even I felt like I needed some talk with her. So I went to her home.

She noticed my Puffy eyes. And asked "Didn't you sleep well? " and waited for my reply.
"Huh? I slept late yesterday" I said.
"Were you crying? Did something happen?? "She started to question.
"No. Nothing happened emmoa" I said as I was having the breakfast she gave.

She wasn't pleased with what I said and she didn't want to push any further.
Then she told me "I hope you remember that young man who saved you". I was surprised when she mentioned about Tae.
" I remember. Why what happened? "I asked with an uneasy tone.
" Aah! I saw him yesterday .He passed by my house , when I went to lock the entrance door at night" Said Mrs. Park.
"Oh! Did you talk to him? " I asked with some curiosity.
"No, I couldn't. I don't think he saw me. He looked so confused" Mrs. Park said.

I felt like telling about yesterday to her. But, time didn't permit me as I had to go to work.

I thanked her for the breakfast and went to school.

At school

I was about to enter into the class. Then I heard a familiar voice saying "Bye Ara"

I turned to look who it was and saw Tae waving bye at Ara with a smily face. He saw and smiled at me. And,even I grinned back at him.

"His smile is so contagious. And, it is so unique. How can I not smile back? " I thought to myself.

He just started to walk towards me to say something and I could feel my heart palpitating when he stood in front of me and before he could say anything, I interrupted him and said "Its getting late for class, see you later" And went inside the class.

He stood perplexed and it ached to see him like that and I felt sooner or later I need to talk to him.

As I had to concentrate on the work, I didn't want to think about what happened yesterday. But, it didn't go as planned.

Tae was ruling my mind. And, I could only think about him the whole time. Somehow I took my classes and went back to staff room to rest. Then I checked my phone and saw there were some text messages and calls.

I saw that there were some messages from Tae and others. I opened Taehyung's text.
Tae: Hey, there?
Jiya: Hello yupp. Hey are you free today??

I replied and waited for his message. And, within seconds Tae texted back to my message.
Tae: Yes. I think we need to talk.

                                       Jiya: Absolutely! We need to talk.

Tae: Can we meet today? Anywhere is fine with me .
                                      Jiya: We shall meet at the park which is near my school?

Tae: sure.

                                      Jiya: I'll meet you after the school hours then. Bye.

Tae: I'll be waiting for you. Bye.

All of the sudden anxiety took over me. I tried to stay as calm as possible. And, also I didn't know what to talk as I was totally confused about my feelings towards him. But, still I managed to meet him.

At the park

I saw Tae, who was already in the park. "Hey, sorry for coming late. When did you get here? " I asked Tae.
"Hey,thats okay. I got here Few minutes back" He said and asked me to sit

"So, how was your day? " He asked to start the conversation.
"It was good. How was yours? " I asked.
"Same. It was good" He said.

And there was awkward silence. Which took over. He didn't want to wait for anything and said.
"I wanted to talk about yesterday. I'm sorry. If I hurted you"
"Hey, don't be sorry. Just tell me why did you kiss me all of a sudden?" I asked.
"The truth is. I kissed you because, I wanted to kiss you" He said.
I was startled and asked "What do you mean? "
"I like you. So, I kissed you" He said looking straight into my eyes and his tiger like gaze penetrating deep into my hear and making it all pounding.

I stayed silent and Tae continued to say with a little smirk"As far as I remember, even I got a Peck on my cheeks and that is all you Jiya-shii".

I looked at the ground which was nothing but a grass. And, didn't answer anything as I got shy.

" Jiya-shii? Are you listening to me?" Tae asked in a serious tone.
I looked at him and started to fidget my hands. I couldn't stay like that for longer and said "Yes. I remember giving small peck to you'.
" So, why did you do it? Was it because of heat of the moment? " Tae asked.
"No. Even I don't know. I'm confused" I said.
"Confused because? " Tae was waiting for my reply.
"I think I like you. But, I don't know".

Tae was happy on listening to me and little disappointed when I said I don't know. He didn't want to force me and he didn't tell anything. He was silent for a while and this time I broke the silence by saying "The moment I saw you ,when I opened my eyes in ER I started to get feelings on you. But, then I thought it may be because you helped me".

Tae was listening carefully and again I said "I couldn't stop thinking about you since that day. I know it's too fast, it's just been 3-4 days since we got to know each other. And, that's why I'm confused".

Tae was such a gentleman. He didn't want me to feel uncomfortable and he said
" It's okay. You can take some time to think how you feel about me. Don't get hard on yourself. I get it you are completely lost at your own thoughts. But, what ever your answer is I'll accept it. Even I started to get feelings on you since the day you were attacked. And, I have come to a conclusion that I like you ".
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