You need HELP. (Tommy Angst)

nightmares in your grasp. (1)

 OTHER TW
none that i am aware of ✨✨



   

                             I head over , and grab my mothers phone.

I scroll over to watch something, then click on the red and white icon, youtube. As the app opens up, some recommended videos pop up, My brain start deciding which content creator I should watch. "Mmm, nothing really cool yet,"
Then I look over a certain someone's profile picture. Oohh! DanTDM! His video loads up, my eyes distracted by the bright screen and excitement rushes over me.

"YEAAA!" I suddenly shout out, then awkwardly stare back at my mother, who is rubbing a cloth against a stained white plate, next to a stack of clean dishes. "Sorryy Mum.." She smiles and quietly replies, "It's ok Tommy, don't worry about it dear." 
"Hey! Look at this video mumm!!" I run up to her with phone in hand, then roll back to the beginning of the video. "That's nice, who is that? Wasn't that Daniel? " MotherInnit then pauses the video, looking at me, waiting for response. "It's DanTDM! Y'know what, I wanna be a big famous epic youtuber like him someday!"

I then look up to see the mother figure put her palm on the side of my face, before she could respond, I voice the words out my lips. "Hey by the way, could we have some pasta for next dinner too?"  "No I don't think so, we already had pasta today, if there are leftovers you can eat some in the morning." My lips suddenly curved downwards, "Aww , ok.."

I went to walk to my room, entered then flopped on my bed. I tilt my head over to the clock, it's almost 10:10 pm, meaning it's almost my bedtime. 
I look under the closet, suddenly a black shadowy figure forms itself and exits from under the closet, I panic and cover myself with my warm blanket. ".. holy shit.. it's been a few seconds.. maybe if I.."

I swing my blonde hair over to my ear, uncovering my face then look up above the blanket, holy fucking fucks. there are more of them. My world blurs as I struggle to comprehend it all,  I start sobbing, my tears quickly start disintegrating and then-

(Back to reality.)

My eyes start flinching open to the sound of my alarm beeping, I was quite unsettled and disturbed by the dream, I'm not even sure what that was about. It was alright until I happened to have played back into my kid years. What even happened?

I sit up, then somehow get the motivation to shove the covers off my legs. Making my way to the bathroom. I do the usual such as brush my teeth and take a shower.

-time skip

Time to start another day Tom Simons.

I arrive at my room then proceed take off my towel then get dressed for the day, It's nothing more than just a shirt and some pants. Keeping it plain. I never really liked being the center of attention till my career came along, I had to force myself to get used to it if I'm being honest. I guess my life is supposed to be  "alright". I mean, a lot of people would want to have my job, it's just putting on a exaggerated version of yourself to appeal to audiences so you don't look like a fuckin loser. Hell even as a kid I would start tearing up happily over how successful I've become. Somehow, I'm not happy. I'm so selfish. I'm really selfish. I'm a bad person.

                                                                                       ⚠ TW !! ⚠

I look over at my bl4d3, shit, I should probably hide that. I quickly put it in my closet, then walk downstairs to the kitchen.


                                                                                  ⚠ TW !! ⚠

My mum averts her eyes towards me, she just looks at me, I quizzically look at her, then the words spill out her mouth. "Toms, it's breakfast. You haven't ate at all these past 4 days, you haven't even picked up your plate."

Shit. Anxiety quickly rushes over me at the idea of me being found out, I don't need help. I don't need my mothers pity. I've been starving myself for about a month now, I make the, 'i'll eat it in my room' excuse. However, lately I haven't had the motivation to even pick up that plate.

"Toms..?"

I glared back at her, I really need to pull myself together before she notices. I really don't want to deal with the burden.

"Yeah mum, I'll eat in my room."

She looks at me, it's quite obvious to tell by her caring face that she is... worried for me.

"Ok, but actually eat alright?"

I guess, I'll just have to flush it down the toilet then.

Oh well.

Oh well.

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IM NOT VERY GOOD AT WRITING BARE WITH ME!! I WILL BE WORKING ON OTHER CHAPTERS SOON JUST HOLD ON! \(@^0^@)/