Maybe This Christmas ~ Bill Kaulitz

Chapter 4 ~ Locked doors and Lipstick

I wasn't staying here any longer. I just couldn't. Not with them in the room beside me. 

They would all be waiting for me come out, just so they could sneer and pout at me for being such a baby. There was a back door in here, I could get out using that.

Clumsily, I stumbled around the room, still clutching the photo to myself, although it was digging into my arm. I pushed through the mess on the floor, my eyes blurred with tears. I somehow reached the door, pressing against it, my hand fumbling uselessly at the handle. 

It wouldn't budge. 

Using all my strength I threw my fist into it, making a loud thud. All I got was a stinging scrape across my knuckles. 

It was pointless. The door was locked. Of course it was locked. It was always locked. 

I turned around, leaning back against it and gently sliding to the floor, sobbing into my hands. 

Everything was going wrong. How had I gone from having a genuinely nice chat with the nicest guy I'd met in years, to sobbing in a corner with a bleeding hand. 

The door to the front of the shop slowly opened and Bill came in, a concerned and sympathetic look on his face. "I'm sorry about Tom. He's older than me, so always acts dumb when i'm around girls." he apologised, scratching his head, sliding his head into his back pocket. "Are-are you alright?" 

I hid my face, turning away from him, tears still dribbling down my cheeks.

Bill came and sat beside me, sighing gently. "Who's this then?" he asked, nodding towards the photo. 

I pushed it into his hands, wiping my damp cheeks. 

"He's cute." Bill murmured, reading the picture, wiping its glass with his sleeve. "Shane. He's someone special?" 

My heart shuddered as I reached out, stroking Shane's photographic hair. "He was. He's gone now." I murmured, looking down at my hands. 

"Oh, I'm very sorry." he placed the photo on the floor, sliding his arm around my shoulders. "My deepest condolences." 

I pushed my head into his shoulder, sobbing. Instead of acting awkward, like practically every other guy on the planet, he patted my back soothingly, slowly rocking back and forth. Calming me.

"What happened here?" he slipped his hand into mine, running his thumb along below my red knuckles. 

"It was an accident. I didn't mean to do it." I told him, holding my hand out I front of us both. 

"Do you have first aid?" 

"Yeah, it should be over there." I pointed towards the cupboard that the green box had been put in. 

Bill stood, getting the box and bringing it back to me. He took out some wipes, cleaning my hand with them and then sticking some plasters over the top. He kissed my knuckled, giving me a smile. "All better now, yeah?" 

"All better, thank you." I nodded, leaning in and hugging him again, sighing heavily. 

We sat like that for quite a while, just seemingly happy in each others embrace. I had cried myself dry.  There were no more tears to be shed. At least for a little while. 

"You never answered my question. Do you want to go grab a coffee?" Bill asked, his voice so gentle and delicate that a single breath could distort it.  

I sniffed, nodding, leaning away from him a little, so as to look at him properly. "I look awful though. You don't want to go anywhere with me." I sighed.