Are You Alright? // South Park

No, I'm short.

"Thank you for blessing us with your kindness!" Cartman said sarcastically. I rolled my eyes and got ready to ask my question.

"How many piercings do you guys have?" I asked, "I wanna see them!"

All the guys answered at once, so all I could hear was a loud jumble of words.

"Shush shush! Just go one at a time." I said loudly.

Clyde piped up first, "I only have a lobe piercing, but Craig has a bunch!"

He wrapped his arm around Craig's shoulder as he motioned me over. I sat down right in front of them. He showed off his earrings to me first. They were a standard steel stud. I smiled and turned my attention to Craig. His Chullo hat covered his ears, so I plucked it off his head. He slightly blushed as I place his hat on my head.

"C'mon! Lemme see!"

Craig silently turned his head.

"GET OUT THESE ARE SO COOL!" I squeal. I see a small smile form on Craig's lips. He has spacers, a foward helix, and three upper helixes! I move my head to get a closer look.

"Ooh! Show her your tongue too!" Clyde bubbled. Craig turned to face me.  I felt my face get warm at the lack of space between us. The slight scent of cigarette smoke and spearmint gum radiating off him is oddly enticing.  I scooted back as Craig stuck out his tongue. 

"HOLY SHIT!" I burst, suddenly forgetting about my embarrassment. All of the guys chortled at my enthusiastic reaction. Craig wiggled around his split tongue to demonstrate. I'm practically sobbing at this point; THIS GUY IS SO COOL.

"Aren't these illegal? Aren't you too young? How did you even do this?" I rambled.

"He did it with a fishing line in freshmen year." Token answered, "Tweek was panicking about it for a good month!"

"HE- He could ha-have gotten an INFECTION!" Tweek yelped.

"I was fine. I am still fine." Craig assured.

"Ooh, he also has a septum!" Token said, as if he suddenly just realized. I tilted my head as I looked at his nose. I don't see any septum? Craig rolled his eyes at Token.

"No, I'm not showing her my septum. I look like a fucking bull." Craig said, flipping off Token.

"A-awhh c-cuh-come on, man!" Jimmy prodded.

"No. I don't even have it on." Craig rolled his eyes.

"Ugh, totally weak." Cartman groaned.

"Shut up, lard ass." Craig sassed.

I finally went around in the circle and saw everyone's piercings. Most of the guys just have a standard lobe. Though, Stan has a Daith in addition to his lobe. Apparently, he got his lobe piercing when he was going through a Goth phase in Fourth grade.

"Waitwaitwait, goth phase?" I laughed. "Why did you have a goth phase in the fucking Fourth grade?"

"Wendy broke up with him for the first time and he was moping around for ages!" Kyle replied.