Chapter 1

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...


Hot.

It is a cool night in March. The wind roars on the other side of the window and threatens to burst the windows that I closed last night when I saw how dark clouds covered the sky. I find myself in my bed, without pajamas of any kind and without a paltry sheet covering my body, and yet every pore of my skin expands to let out the sweat that struggles to refresh me.

I feel hot; very hot.

His body is covering me, holding me, sliding through mine. I feel his weight. His skin caresses me; his lips brush mine; his tongue bathes in my mouth; his hair tangles with mine; his breath fills my lungs; his hips slide between mine. He penetrates me with sweetness and spirit, leading his moans to get on with mine; and, his eyes... his eyes make me feel loved.

The wind blows even stronger and manages to disengage the lock of the very old window of my room that opens wide allowing the cold to reach my bed and take me out of my dreams.

"Noooo..." I grumbled finding myself startled, partially clothed, and all alone on my bed. "It's been the best dream I have ever had..."

I closed the window as best I could and dragged the chiffonier in front of it so that the wind wouldn't do its thing again.

"And... what I'm supposed to do now with this heat? I'm too horny!"

I sighed and did a belly flop against my bed, making the box spring threaten to run the same fate as the lock of the window. I slid my hand under my underwear, closed my eyes, and tried to remember the face of the man in my dream, his hunky body, his crooked smile, and his warm gaze. I tried to remember how he fiercely thrust me and took my breath away; how he was the only thing I wanted in this life. But I didn't make it. The memory of him was rapidly disappearing from my consciousness, leaving me frustrated and unfilled.

I looked up just enough to catch sight of the numbers on the broken and restored (with a huge amount of tape) wall calendar that hung on the shelf next to my bed and sighed again.

"Couldn't it have been him? He sure wouldn't have done that to me..."

I returned my face to the pillow and, without even bothering to remove my hand from my inner thighs, I fell asleep waiting for the next and hateful day.

And it dawned. And what my body asked me to be an annoying day full of wind, ugly clouds, and grit in the eyes and teeth, turned out to be a sunny and radiant day drenched in a soft and pleasant breeze and bathed in one of those blue skies that make your existence happy.

"Crap."

I had no choice. I put on comfortable jeans and a light T-shirt, untangled and braided my hair, grabbed my cell phone, keys, and the devil's box, and went for a walk along the dock.

Even the sea. Even the sea sparkled with joy. The rough waves of the previous day had given way to graceful ones that seemed to say good morning to you with a smile as they passed by your side. The world was laughing at me.

I resigned myself and sat at the end of the pier to enjoy the weather that announced the imminent arrival of good weather and I relaxed listening to the waves breaking against the pylons and feeling how small and cold droplets reached me.

Maybe it was a sign. The arrival of spring, a new beginning. The opportunity to leave the clouds behind and enjoy the breeze and the sun. Maybe it was time to stop feeling stupid and rebuild my life. Perhaps it was time to regain my self-confidence, pride, and hope.

It was definitely time to get rid of him.

I took the box out of my pants pocket, opened it, and felt a lump in my throat. That red stone burned in my hands. That gold band was the memory of the worst mistake of my life. That ring didn't link me to him, it linked me to the memory of him.

"This is over."

Ring in hand, I raised my arm and unleashed all my rage at that launch. Goodbye to pain, goodbye to deception, goodbye to complexes, goodbye to shame, goodbye to innocent Anna, goodbye to bastard Hans.

"Ow!!"

"Ops..."

Maybe it was too soon to say goodbye to shame...

The rage discharge was a real success, but the launch was less so. As soon as it flew off, the ring crashed into the protruding portion of the pylon, bounced, and smashed into the forehead of a man who had apparently just appeared behind me. That immense blond juggled for a few seconds trying to save the ring until finally, one of his gigantic hands managed to capture it.

"Are you kidding me?!"

Wasn't I going to be able to get rid of it?!

"Throw it!"

"Throw?! Do you know what this is worth?! If you don't want it, hock it, but don't feed it to the fish!"

"What I do with it has nothing to do with you!"

"It has since it marked my forehead!"

"It couldn't mark..."

I looked up to see the damage my poor aim had caused and the air suddenly stopped entering my lungs as my eyes widened in pure disbelief, letting only a sigh leave my lips.

"You."  

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