you're making a fool of me , baji.
i love the way you talked to me whenever we woke up in bed together.
i love the way you would surround me in kisses whenever i relapse.
i love the way you used to hold me tight , not wanting to let go until i pull you off.
i loved you.
i got up from my knees and muttered my last few words.
thank you for the happiest year of my life , baji-san.
thank you for making me feel love.
thank you so much ,
but i can't forgive you.
i can't forgive you for leaving me.
i can't forgive you for dying.
i can't.
my scars are healing , but my heart isn't.
who's gonna be there for me when i relapse?
who's gonna be there to comfort me when i have my panic attacks?
who's gonna tell me they love me everyday , and give me morning hugs?
who ...?
it's not gonna be you anymore.
i've never cried this much , until i heard of your death.
i wished i could've changed the past.
but i can't.
i'm weak.
you gave my life meaning , and light.
now , i can't look at life the same.
but,
it's okay ,
i love you too , baji.
we'll meet again soon , alright?
i will look for you in the next lifetime ,
until we stay together.
wait for me , please.
[ baji keisuke ]
1990 - 2021
