The Definition of Love

Chapter Eleven ~ Wedding {Emma Swan}

I snatch the phone out of his hand and forcefully punch in my number. When it comes time for me to add a contact name I pause; ‘Emma Swan’ feels too formal, but just ‘Emma’ seems too similar to the woman in my head that I am trying so hard to ignore. I finally settle on ‘Swan,’ I can't explain why but I always feel at home when he calls me that.

He grins at me as I hand it back. I try so hard to not look him in the eyes. I finally storm back to my car, the more time I spend around him, the more I look at him, the worse I feel about what I have been putting the both of us through.

Why can I just accept him? It’s clear that the only thing he wants or cares about in this town is me ... or the Savior, I can't really keep us straight anymore. He is the only person, besides Henry, that feels right to me. It takes everything in me not to run off and find him every day. I need that bloody pirate, and I don't even know who he is.

I know why I can accept him! It’s because he’s a pirate, a lying, cheating, deceitful pirate. There is no way I could ever trust him, there is no way I could ever give myself entirely to him. Even though he feels right, perfect even, my entire life was turned upside down when he first came. He wants me to believe I'm some “fairytale Princess from another world,” really? But then again … could I really be her? The visions, the memories, they all seem so … real. What if the curse really happened, what if I really forgot everything and everyone? God, how could I even think that; it's crazy, I'm crazy to even think for a second that the curse was, is real.

I shake my head as I pull my phone out of my back pocket. I have a new message notification from … from Killian. I reluctantly open it.

“ I'm on my way to talk to Neal, anything you want me to tell him.” - Killian

I sigh, why would he ever want to go to talk to Neal, how would he even know that bastard?  I begin to type my response.

“Just ask him why he would leave me, and what I did wrong.” - Emma

Almost instantly feel a buzz and slowly pull my phone back out.

“Of course love. I hope to get to see you again soon.” - Killian

I go to text back when I think better of it, I don't want to encourage him. I continue to walk down Main Street, lost in my own thoughts.  I eventually find myself wandering to Regina's house, where I know Henry will probably be.

I push open the iron gate and make my way down the walkway, I knock loudly on the door. A grinning Regina answers and ushers me inside.

“Will you take them,” she asks while motioning to the small children clinging to her arms and torso as a follow her into her office.

“Of course,” I reply as I place the two of them on my opposite hips. I can't explain why, but this position almost feels natural … familiar. Did the Savior have a child, could that explain why I am so comfortable around young children? I quickly push the thought away, that would be impossible … I must just be remembering Henry as an infant; but that would have been so long ago … why would I only be remembering that sensation now? I shrug as I focus back down on the children in my arms.