KARMA

2. SECRET

Ryan's in the shower. Again.

Come to think of it, he's in a hurry to get to the shower these days.

He used to stop to hug me, kiss me, the moment he came through the door.

The last time he did that was ---- let's see ---- last Tuesday? That's four days ago.

Which means he's been dropping in at Susan's first the past four evenings, before he came back home to his clueless little wifey.

Or, maybe, they met up somewhere. His office. Or a hotel room. Ryan's a rich guy, money's no problem for him. Which reminds me ---- I need to check his credit card bills. And ----

I need to check his phone. Now. While his in the shower, washing off her scent.

It's crazy. It's 1.00 a.m in the morning ---- yes, that's how late he came home ---- and I'm clutching his phone, staring down at it.

It's locked.

I key in the pin with shaking fingers. 2292. 2 February 1992. My birthday.

It unlocks, just as a text pings through.

Susan.

Hey, babe. You back home? You fucked me so hard I'm still sore.

The bitch.

A new text pings.

Can't wait to see you tomorrow night. I need a good workout to keep me going till next Monday. The study. 8.00 pm. Make an excuse to L. I'll be waiting. Night. Love you.

Silence from the bathroom.

Ryan's finished showering.

I slide his phone back quietly on the side table. Climb back onto the bed. Turn to the side. Close my eyes.

I hear the bathroom door open, the pad of his bare feet approaching the bed.

The mattress dips a little as he climbs in.

I feel his body warmth as he spoons me, kissing me softly, tenderly, on the side of my neck.

His cock is soft, flacid, as he pulls me against his length. How many times did he fuck her? It hasn't seemed to stop him wanting me, though. Yesterday, he mounted me while I was asleep in bed, and woke me up with his thrusting. "Nothing like a good old morning fuck to start the day," he had grinned, flipped me over on my hands and knees, and drove into me again. And again.

And then he went to work, I decided to do the laundry, and my life turned upside down.

In the blink of an eye, everything has changed.

Yesterday, I loved him.

Today, I hate him.

"I love you, Lisa," he murmurs, stroking my cheeks softly.

I keep my eyes closed. Breathe deep, evenly.

I can feel the weight of his gaze.

"My beautiful Lisa," he whispers.

And then, so low it comes out a sigh: "Forgive me."