The wrong side

2

Disclaimer: Mature language

I bring a surgical mask out of my pocket and wear it to cover my face. As I walked back to the house I saw an angry sienna drive by me on her bike. She didn't notice me so I rushed back to the building. And went upstairs. I unlocked and opened the door and saw mama Esmerelda in the kitchen aurora on her back."I am back mama" I said. "Oh, honey I am glad. Come let's start cooking" she said as she patted aurora's head lightly as a signal she got down from mama's back and walked towards the couch and sat there.

I took the items and headed towards the kitchen. I started to wash the vegetables as mama bring out some pots to cook. "Nat dear?" Mama said as she walked beside me."Yes, mama?" I said as I turned off the tap and faced her. She took my hands in hers and looked at me with desperation. "Will you tell me something?" her voice was laced with sadness. I softened my expression and squeezed her hands lightly. "Of course mama," I said looking in her eyes. "You are in a mafia aren't you?" My eyes widened and I looked away and laughed nervously."What are you talking about mama?" I said as I turned the tap on.

"Their men came to this building looking for you. They had been checking the whole area" my body tensed up. "Did they hurt you?" I said as my grip tightened on the tap. "No but they sure threatened me to not say a soul or they'll kill me" she replied and sat down on a chair. I gritted my teeth. 'how dare they!' I thought but then realized that mama knows I turned around to look at her. "A-are you scared of me?" I asked my heart desperate to know the answer. "No, darling. I would never be scared of you. I trust you with my life" she said as she signaled me to lay my head on her lap.

I slowly walked towards her questions in my mind."Bu-" before I could ask any other questions she told me to sush by putting a finger on her lips. I laid my head on her lap and hugged her legs. It made me feel peace and warmth. I closed my eyes and got closer wanting to be like this forever. "My daughter died when she was 21 due to brain tumor that was when you entered my life. Gave me the feeling of a mother. Called me mama and at the end of the day, you always protected me. I know your mafia had tried to kill me before just because I owe this building and they needed it for a secret hideout. But you stopped them. You always protected me. Risked yourself getting caught. You were always ready to kill for me. How could I judge you? I love you with my whole heart honey no matter who you are or what you become. I know there is a reason for what you do and I don't need to know it. I just need you to be happy." She said caressing my head when aurora jumped on mama's lap and sat beside my head. 

My eyes were numbed. At the end of the day, there is peace for me. I have a family no matter how much of a monster I become they'll be here. "Loving someone always has consequences and I am ready to face it love so no matter how far away you are. Your mama will always be hoping for your wellbeing and will wait for you to come to her." She cooed and I sighed in relief maybe. Maybe the fact I can be true in front of someone made this heavy chest a little light. 

"Mama if I had to go away for a month will you wait for me?" I asked her."Only if you leave after 2 weeks. I missed you!" She said and I nodded and got up and hugged her. She pecked the top of my head. We then joked around and made a meal after that mama went back to her apartment to sleep.

I on the other hand got changed to sleep but I was sleepless. I saw aurora sleeping so I quietly tiptoed to the living room and sat beside the window. The full moon was shining brightly. I lightly hummed a tune that even I did not know of. I wondered how my life would have been if I never did any of this. Maybe I could trust people. Maybe I wouldn't overthink everything.