AZIZE

Chapter 44

"They say that the world was built for two,
Only worth living if somebody is loving you."
**

Inside these walls of his secret house, there are no barriers or walls between us, and that is why I have a secret bond with this place.

I didn't let go of his hand, appreciating his words that he is trying not to lose me, and I was trying to give him the chance to prove it.

"You really hurt me." I reproached him swiftly once we took a seat.

"I am sorry. I would never do this intentionally, and this is no excuse but I never felt or been with someone in this way, in the shape we have now, everything is new to me."

I scoffed, "Shape?"

He pursed his lips, "Sorry, relationship."

"Let's talk honestly about that while we have the chance. Kartal, do you really think that we are walking on the right way?" I asked, wanting an assurance selfishly.

His face was puzzled, "What do you mean? Do you regret that-"

"Not regret, but a little fear. I never been in a relationship before. Most of the time I might have my own doubts about everything, and I am tired of living this way."

He tried to say something but he didn't, so I continued, "Kartal, I need to rest. I can't handle this back and forth, I can't handle my own doubts and unfortunately I can't handle yours too."

"Do you want to take a step back?" He asked with a barely collected tone. He is just as lost as I am.

"No, I just want us to admit that we got to a far point out of nowhere already, and if we weren't honest with each other and with ourselves we will lose everything. We have to talk everything out, communication is our way out. For example I hated how I found out that I can't leave the palace today. You could've told and prepared me for this better than I just find it out."

"You are absolutely right, I should've told you that I can't bare the idea of any harm might happen to you just because you're connected to me, I see potential threat about everything now and I can't risk not taking any extra cautions." He tried to explain himself and I am semi-convinced. See this might work.

"Also showing me that I am helpless and powerless about my choices was hurtful."

"I deeply regret this too. You're free to choose everything you want in your life, and I will try to support you in every possible way."

I raised my eyebrows at him and he said, "I am sorry that my words might not even seem trustable to you." He looked ashamedly around.

I shook my head at our situation, then reached over and rest my palm on his cheek, turning his head to look at me. "I trust you, Kartal. I wouldn't have been here if I don't." I assured him and he gave me a small smile and hugged me. I rested my head on the crook of his neck and he placed a quick kiss on my forehead.

"Can I ask for one last thing?" I looked up at him and he looked back adorably and said, "Anything for you."

"You're never allowed to run away from our arguments again, the amount of times you left me by myself is disturbing, I think we should argue in a locked place." I pointed to his chest and he laughed.

"Okay, noted." He smiled at me and I rested my head again.

"I wouldn't trade this moment for the world." He said quietly and I smiled and closed my eyes, not wanting to let go of this moment too.

***

I woke up in a familiar bed with a familiar scent filling it, Kartal's bed.

This is not the first time to wake up here on my own, I quickly retrieved a memory of Kartal kissing my forehead then carrying me off the couch.