Inside this cell

Red Dirt

" Get up.. Hey C'mon, wake up!!" A slight jolt to my body as I see Ronnie shaking me. " Dude get up, we have to go, the cops are everywhere we need to get the fuck out of here". I was laying by the fire, with a spilt bottle of gin in my hand that had been seeping its way into my clothing for some time. I can't even gather a thought, I have no idea where I am but Ronnie has my hand and is dragging me away quicker than my feet can catch up. " Slow down, what the fuck, where are we going, where are we!!!!" I slur but I know it kind of made a sentence, " Just get in the car we aren't waiting around to find out what's going on" Ronnie is shaking, he's fumbling to get his keys from every pocket he checks.
I stood there, like a zombie, but a graceful zombie, I had no urgency to move, no thoughts in my mind nor the capacity to even try and make a thought. Ronnie is inside the car he reaches across  to the passenger door and slams it open into my thigh, " GET THE FUCK IN THE CAR". I feel like I'm in some messed up episode of black mirror, I have no clue what the fucks going on but I know it'll make sense in the end. The sun is beginning to rise, and we drive silently towards it, Ronnie looks panicked and yet I feel as calm as ever. I didn't feel the need to ask what was happening, in hindsight that's probably really bloody weird given the situation.
I am sitting in the car staring out the window into nothingness, my mind absent of thoughts and feelings.
I hear muffled voices talking frantically, its Ronnies phone on loudspeaker. " I don't know man, she is covered, she is just staring, what do I do?!!", Ronnies speech is pressured and the only thoughts projecting are panic and paranoia. I don't know who he is talking to but it is a guy, he is telling Ronnie to take me somewhere but all I can hear is the sound not the words.
We are driving for what seems like an entire day, yet we have only crossed towns, time is slow and the outside world seems vacant. I see people walking the street going about their normal ordinary days, I look to my hands they look dirty as though I have been digging in the dirt, I pause for a moment and I feel my mind trying to figure out what day and time it is. People are walking, the sun is on its way to the top of the sky, so it has to be mid morning. My hands covered in dirt.. this one I cant explain or rationalise just yet.
I turn to Ronnie he still looks as pale as a ghost with a look of despair and fear all at the same time. " Where are we going?" I ask in the softest tone I think I have ever used, " Ronnie....." Is he ignoring me? Am I talking?.
We pull into a driveway of a home I don't know, it looks a little run down with an overgrown garden crying for maintenance. Before I can ask where we are my door is opening. " Come on, you have to get out, lets go.." Ronnie is holding the door open, I can see he is shaking and he wont make eye contact with me.
" You can stay here for a while until we figure something out, have a shower and there's some clothes in the bathroom, put them on and leave yours by the door".
" Ronnie, where are we? What's going on, I'm so confused" I feel weird now, I can start to think a little quicker and time has sped up to real life speed.
" Just get in the shower first, then we will sit and talk, I have to go make some calls, I'll wait out there for you", Ronnie is panicked yet trying to keep his voice calm.
I'm standing in the shower, red dirt is beginning to stain the water flowing off my body, I stand with my head down staring at my feet trying to understand how I got to where I am. I hear yelling through the walls of the bathroom, It's Ronnie but I don't know who the other voice could be. I try to make myself move at a faster pace than a snail could move, I'm fumbling to dry myself and grab an unknown persons clothes and quickly get the fuck out of the bathroom.
" Ronnie.. Ronnie" I can hear the fear in my own voice, " Ronnie can we go?", he looks at me for the first time today, " We cant leave just yet, come on lets go sit down", as he takes my hand and leads me to the living room.
" What's going on, where the actual fuck have you brought me Ron?, you throw me in the car, you take me to god knows where, you throw me in the shower and make me wear someone else's clothes, that's fucked up on its own, and you haven't even looked at me once!! What the fuck Ron, what is happening!!?
" You don't remember? How can you sit there acting as if this is my fault, you're here because I'm trying to save your ass, I'm the one who is freaking the fuck out, you have put me in this position and I'm just trying to do my best to help you" Ronnie is clearly in a state of panic with anger emerging through.
"I remember a party, we went to a party... I remember not knowing anyone, and I remember feeling sick, then you woke me up.. I don't understand Ron, why are we here".
Everyone in the room is looking at me like I just spoke a foreign language, not to mention one of the faces I don't even know, I'm assuming he is the one who actually lives in this house.
Ronnie keeps looking at his phone, he cant seem to sit still and I now more than ever realise that my mum is probably freaking out. I never actually went home, she knows nothing about where I was and am. " Ron, I need to go home, my mum is probably going mental and I don't want to get into any more shit than I already am with her".
Ronnie looked at the guy siting across from him and gave a little shoulder shrug with a look that had no answers. " What can I do man, we cant stay here forever" Ronnie says to the occupier of this home I seem to have invaded. " Your call.. I don't know what you should do, probably take her home".
Ronnie takes a deep breath and gets up off the couch, " K, lets go, I'll take you home".
I stand up and want to run out of the front door, I have never felt so confused, scared and numb in all my life.
The car ride to my house was completely silent, I have never seen Ronnie like this and my mind begins to race at a 100 miles per hour wondering what I've done wrong to make him so repulsed by me that he cant simply look at me or talk to me. Ronnies friend came in the car with us and kept trying to make conversation with me, he spoke so formally, I was trying to figure out how Ronnie would know someone like this and why he is apart of getting me home, he just imposed himself into our situation, a situation I still can't figure out.
We pulled up to my drive way and my mum came charging out of the front door full steam down the driveway to the car and just about ripped me out of the car before the door could even open to its capacity.
" Oh my god, where on earth have been, Ive been frantic, Ive called everyone, where were you??" I stared blankly at her trying to get my brain to catch up to make some type of response.
" I was with Ronnie, we were out and my phone, I lost it... I think...I couldn't call.. Sorry"
" Sorry.... Sorry, are you kidding, get inside this is insane, I don't know what to say right now, I'm fuming" She shoved me in the direction towards the house.
I looked back to say goodbye to Ronnie and my mum is talking to Ronnies friend, I hope she is ripping shreds through him too because if we hadn't stopped at his house I may have just had enough time to sneak back in to the house and act as if nothing had happened. That was the original plan anyway.