Chapter 14

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At a shopping mall. Lyle, in his bed, is pushed through a wall.
"Oh, Lord. Where are we now?! Let me perish!"

Keenie smiles "We're here to show you another thing life is worth living for: childhood wonderment!" Keenie motions to a crowd of kids cheering by a sitting Santa Claus. One kid wears a "Craft Mine" shirt, while another eats his booger.
"Why, look at those sweet, disease-ridden vermin. Their joy comes from innocence, unspoiled by the burdens of adulthood... and their middle-class existence. Such simple joy they have. It is inspiring. Thank you for showing me this."

"Hey, dipshit!" Blitz, Y/N and Millie, who are dressed as elves, while a grumpy Moxxie wears a reindeer costume. They stand by Santa and a kid. "Wanna see whose lap you're sittin' on?!" Blitz rips off the red robe. "Santa" is revealed as an ugly gnome wearing a "#Cuties" shirt, all while making a gnome noise. The kids scream and run. Lyle sobs like a baby as Collin and Keenie cover his eyes. A concerned Cletus pushes the bed away as a boy screams "Santa's EVIL!!"
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Y/N POV

Lyle in bed in the woods next to a wooden sign reading "Lover's Lookout"
"Eh! This place reeks of TEENAGERS!"

Cletus felt love in his soul as he spoke "Lovers' Lookout, sir! We're here to remind you about possibly life's greatest joy of all!"

Lyle holds up creepy grabby hands "Money!" He says with greed
Collin shook his head "No! Love."
"I've never been in love before. I imagine it's quite nice!"
"It's not too late, sir! You can still find--" Collin tries to say till Blitz came out of nowhere laughing, they turn to see us
that just arrive wearing wigs and dresses.
"HA! Nice try, ugly." He pulls out a megaphone. "Hey, horny lovers! Which one of you would fuck this old man?!" Blitz says, pointing at Lyle, All the cars speed away in an instant. Lyle becomes dejected.

Collin gets into Blitzo's face "You know, you three are so utterly c- c- cruel! We're just trying to give hope to someone in need!"

Moxxie puts his hand on his hip "Oh, and you three are so superior to us just because WE want some selfish, greedy, authoritarian capitalist to keel over DEAD!" Moxxie through his hands out for emphasis.

"You're makin' things too real now, Moxxie." I says as I sprays water from a spray bottle into Moxxie's face, making him flinch and hiss at me.

Millie took another picture of me to send to Alastor

Millie took another picture of me to send to Alastor

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Alastor: Wait... just you wait

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