A Devoted Heart (Attack on Titan // LeviHan) - Part 2

The Queen of the Underground

Two weeks later, Trost District

"Don't be ridiculous," Mike said, his long, muscular legs slightly elevated and crossed at the ankles, his hands folded leisurely behind his head, "I'm not Commander material."

"What?" Zoë blinked at him owlishly. She felt drunk somewhat and had serious trouble focusing on his face. Her eyes were not what they had once been and it almost seemed as if Mike was hidden behind a veil of scentless smoke? "You are tall, well-built, have blond hair, and are always serious and calm. If that is not Commander material, I don't know what is!"

You also have fabulous calves, she added in her head, squinting at the blurry image next to her, like tree trunks. Commanders should have tree trunk legs in my opinion.

"Look in the mirror, darling," Mike purred, slowly turning to move his index finger from her nose, over her chin, through the valley between her breasts down to her belly button, where he stopped. She shuddered. His touch was cold and as unsubstantial as a ghost's, "you are the Commander of the Survey Corps, Zoë Hange! If you are not Commander material, I don't know who is!"

She shook her head. "But it's too much of a burden. I can't do it."

"Hear, hear," Mike chuckled. "So, you're saying you fooled us all these years? You just played being one of the smartest people alive?"

"Levi thinks I'm shit," she blurted out. "He doesn't respect me at all!"

Mike laughed. "That Shorty? Don't mind him, he's an annoying midget, all bark, little bite. Erwin used violence on him to make him eat out of his hand, try it too."

"You mean... hit him?"

"Yes, hit him, throw him in prison, torture him, whatever needs to be done!"

"But I love him," Zoë sobbed, "dammit, I love him, but I just can't seem to reach his heart! He does not let me close enough."

"Ah, the heart," Mike nodded sadly, "forget about his heart, it is already pledged to a different cause: dying! How can there be room for anything else next to such a goal?"

"But I don't want him to die," she sobbed even harder, "anything, but please, don't take Levi from me!"

An image arose in front of her, it felt too damn familiar: Levi, his trembling body bleeding and broken in her arms, his face cut up and ruined. His eyes, half-open, yet non-seeing. His mouth, trying to form words. Say that you love me too, she pleaded, please. Say it. But how could he when he was dying? It was too late. There had never been a future for them.

"You cannot be weak, Zoë, my darling," Mike purred, playfully trying to catch her tears with his ghost-fingers. "If he makes you this weak, cut all ties as fast as you can. The ultimate sacrifice, you know it's coming, right? Humanity's defeat will come only when we stop fighting. As long as we keep fighting, we haven't lost!"

"Not losing is not enough! How can we win?" She screamed out her frustration. "How?"

"You silly goose," Mike said with Levi's voice. "We cannot win, don't you get it? But we can die fighting, fighting honorably. You must dedicate your heart! Ensure that our deaths are not in vain! Follow me! Follow me into death!"

And she did. Together in death was better than not together at all, wasn't it? And yet, she cried big, ugly tears when they rushed towards the advancing army of Titans, their collective heat incinerating everything in their path, the ash trampled into the ground or carried away by the wind. Her hair caught fire first. Then, her clothes. Then, her skin.

Was this honorable enough? She looked at Levi for answers, but he wasn't there. Blackness swallowed her. Everything. Pointless.

Zoë jerked awake, realized with a pang that tears were streaming down her cheeks, and hastily lifted a hand to brush them away. But the hand was incredibly heavy, her arm full of shuddering, thin needles.