𝖜𝖎𝖑𝖑𝖎𝖓𝖌 || 𝖗𝖞𝖚𝖌𝖚𝖏𝖎 𝖐.

𝖈𝖍𝖆𝖕𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝖓𝖎𝖓𝖊

I had to enjoy my little time out because I have to go back to work tomorrow. I was not looking forward to seeing my boss again. 

Last night was definitely something but I can speak again. I was thinking about how he said I wanted attention which is entirely correct because he is so caught up in Valhalla and other people that he forgets about me except when I am in some shit or he is in me.

I was currently still stalling on how I would open up to Hanma about why I did what I did. I have no idea how to explain it or start the conversation. I decided to just go for it though.

I entered the living room and approached Han.

"I'm ready to talk," I state.

Hanma

"I'm ready to listen." I reply back and she takes a seat beside me.

"I did it for myself," she says. "I knew what was going to happen if I went and I wanted it to happen. I knew what his intentions were and I apologize if I didn't listen but I didn't know any better. I basically did it to feel... some sort of feeling of being wanted and knowing the fact that I attracted someone." She says, her voice is cracking a bit between her words.

"I knew he didn't love me and it was just pleasure for himself but I don't see it like that because I did it for myself. I was fed up with you and everything you had going on and you weren't there for me. Everyone was gone and doing something good for themselves while I was just here looking for something that basically wouldn't make me fall apart even more than I already did but that kinda changed because I have you now but again I don't have you." She admitted.

I really felt sorry and needed to apologize to her because I was gone when this stuff happened. She was out here fighting a war by herself.

"Ravyn, look, I am so sorry, baby. I was not here when this happened and that makes me so upset because look at you and me now. The thing is, I know as much as I say that I got you. It seems like I don't and yea I will take the blame for most of it. The reason I say most is because why would you even stoop down to having some random ass dude explore your body because you didn't feel good enough." I started to rant as her eyes got more teary and I had a subtle smile on my face.

Ravyn has been one of the women in my life that I kept around because of how she is. The one I shared the most too and the one I gave my most too. Aside from the other people I have been with they are nowhere compared to her in multiple ways.

Just seeing her brown skin move against me and her orbs stare down at me do something to me that I can't help which makes me so happy that I finally have been more open about it.

"Why did you tell other people about us though." She blurts out and it makes me pause.

"Wha-"

"Han, before you even lie to me. I already know about it. Why did you tell other people that we were fucking like it meant nothing. You are just as bad as that nigga I fucked. As if I wasn't just anything to you other than some sneaky link or a quick fuck. That shit was embarrassing to find out about. Hanma I'm not a fucking checkpoint. You can't do shit like that then come in my face saying how much you love me." She looked down and began fidgeting with her fingers.