Chapter 1

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It was a dark and stormy night, the kind not fit for man nor beast, and yet there Louis was, ploughing through the driving rain.

His hands white-knuckle on the steering wheel as his heart beats in time with the rapid thump-thump-thumping of the windshield wipers, trying to clear the cascading water in a futile effort. Not that it matters. Louis' vision is impaired as much by the water on the glass as it is by the tears welling up in his eyes.

There are no streetlights to guide his way, not out here, wherever here is, and no moon breaking through the thunderous clouds. Even the lightning stabbing at the sodden earth is blocked by the thick canopy of trees that are closed in above him, encircling him, making him feel claustrophobic, like he can't breathe.

He shouldn't be on the road. Not in this weather. But he couldn't stay in the cabin a moment longer, not after his relationship, and with it, his hopes and dreams, had been smashed into a million pieces like the vase he had thrown in a blinding rage when Vincent had shattered his heart.

Louis sobs out an anguished cry as he recalls snippets of Vincent's pitying speech, fresh and painful, cutting through him like a steely blade, wounding his very soul in that way only words can.

I can't do this anymore. I'm not sure I even know what love is. You deserve more. I deserve more.

The life he'd awoken in this morning is like a far flung memory and in stark comparison to this altered state he finds himself in, no longer filled with love and joy and a well laid out plan for the future. Now he has no one and nothing. The one person he thought he could count on for everything had betrayed him and in an instant he'd been stripped of everything.

And so he drives, trying to outrun his heartbreak, to escape, but to where he doesn't even know.

Louis speeds on, barely able to make out the guiding lines on the tar in front of him, the road twisting and turning, black and awash. His headlights reflect off the deluge of raindrops that pound on the roof of his small car; deafening, never ending. He's been driving for too long, he can sense it, unsure if the turn out of the dirt road from the cabin was a mistake, spun around and confused, his brain incapable of determining left from right, up from down as he replays the last four years of his life.

Where had it all gone wrong? Were there signs he should've seen? Had he been too needy, too intense, too fixated on their future and achieving their goals together? He'd thought that's what Vincent had wanted, always so ambitious, so driven. Louis had supported him as he finished his studies and established himself in his career, working shit jobs to make ends meet, being the one Vincent could rely on financially, beside him every step of the way.

Do you even know who you are anymore?

Vincent's question whirls in Louis' head. Does he know? Does he even exist outside of their relationship? Had he really lost himself along the way, so intent on being who he thought Vincent wanted him to be?

But that's what people do, isn't it? They find a partner, someone they grow with and become one; shared ambitions and aspirations, forging a path to an end that meets their goals.

Sure, they'd been an unusual match from the start, an omega and a beta, but Louis had always thought that was what made them special. They actively chose to be with each other, going against societal expectations and norms.

Louis had never much cared for alphas as a rule, always posturing and eyeing him hungrily, like their secondary gender should entitle them to a free pass on courtesy and decency. So Louis had sought out beta partners instead, their calmer demeanor and lack of primal urges more suited to his own disposition.

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