Sacrificed Soul

Chapter Nine

Shaking out of my stupor in much too canine of a way, I look away first as my training has dictated I should. If there is disappointment in the face of Victoria's second soul, I don't see it. What she said confused me. I'm still unsettled. What did she mean by not failing me twice? Without bothering to gather the pieces of my mind back together, I shove my way out through the passenger door. Crossing to the back of what is apparently my own car, my stiff fingers work open the vinyl backing to retrieve my bag. As I shrug the strap over my shoulder, my gaze lands upwards, and I freeze in awe.

The stars twinkling up there, they are so familiar yet so strange all at the same time. The moon, pregnant and shining, is an unblinking eye that stares at the single soul within my two bodies. While I am the first to admit that gods and their fables have always been a mystery to me, in this very moment, with the scents of home mingling on my clothes with that of sand and pack-ties pulling me to the building behind, I can almost imagine them to be real.

"Leanne?"

I turn, Victoria's eyes are clear and blue once again. She doesn't share my confusion at her wolf's words. Maybe she's ignorant to them. I can't be sure, thinking back to that strange moment, whether I felt her human soul present or not.

"Coming," I say, making sure my clothes are correct on my body and placing the beret just so on my head. My hair has enough gel in it to leave a layer over the breadth of a small country, so there isn't anything to fix there. With everything in proper order, I take my first real steps towards pack. The line I crossed when I boarded that homebound plane over twenty hours ago becomes tangible.

I take one more step.

My arms are stiff at my side.

Breathe in.

Another foot forward.

My boot crunches on gravel.

My kidneys ache from the weird way I slept in the car.

Breathe out.

I need to stop. Stop thinking so abruptly. My neck twinges. My breathing halts with my feet. My hands form fists at my sides.

"Hey," Victoria says as I approach her, shattering my internal cataloging. Her hand reaches out briefly, but she seems to think better of it, slapping it down on her thigh, "You'll be, alright. I promise."

There's something about the claim of those words that reminds me of what her second soul had said, but I ignore it. Letting the corners of my mouth tip up in a reassuring way, I toss my trepidation behind my straightened shoulders and march forward.

The doors are closed. The community of wolves hidden behind them is loud, abrasive on ears that are used to much quieter places. I feel the barest moment of hesitation before I brace myself and twist the knob. Both doors swing open, the hinges protesting their need of oil. The crowd doesn't notice at first. I only have the vaguest idea of what this place, this pack meeting hall, had looked like. The walls have an eerily familiar smell of age and shifters long past. The floor is a pretty green color with specks of white and the tread of dirty work boots scruffed across it.

I can feel Victoria waiting patiently behind me, her second soul gently supporting my little hiccup. I think I have a better idea of what the wolf was insinuating, but it's there and gone when I notice the silence. My hands are still occupying the rough wood grain of the hall's doors, and only one foot has made it fully through the entry way. I can only imagine the picture I must make, like some fool who's never seen the inside of a building before.

Clearing my throat, I push the doors a little wider and step fully inside. My hands snap down to my legs, and Victoria's quiet presence urges me forward. Looking into those that encompass pack, I go still as they flinch, taking in my appearance. Mostly, they look at my eyes. It's hard to look away from them, these shifters that still have their other soul. I may be confused as to what I am if neither human nor wolf, and I am always in ascendance.