Hopeful Fear

Intimacy

Kylian didn't dream. Ever since he became a vampire, the curtain of his mind dropped, and he couldn't see the play anymore. He just sits in the empty amphitheater in utter silence waiting for the time to pass.

However, something has changed recently because the dusty curtain lifted suddenly. After almost 400 years Kylian started dreaming again and the experience has rattled him; not just because he didn't understand the message and where it was coming from, but also because vampires couldn't dream. The change locked the doors of the subconscious, and there was no way of getting the key. He missed dreaming tremendously because now there was a gap between each night and he perceived it as a dried-up well that served no purpose at all. Sure, he could get some rest but is that really it? There was simply too much blackness everywhere, both on the inside as well as outside.

Well, it seems this has changed now and although he was thrilled from one point of view he was also very worried. How come he has started dreaming? How was it possible? And what did those dreams mean?

He got up earlier than ever before, even before the sun truly set to let the night take its place. He was protected, though, as the automated blinds wouldn't lift until the right moment, but the dreaming experience still left him confused and slightly disoriented. He barely managed to walk to the bathroom and it wasn't until the cold shower attacked his hard muscles that he truly managed to wake up.

After the shower, he put on a clean white shirt and a dark pair of jeans. The clothes gave off an illusion that he was ready for facing the night ahead, but the truth was different. He had no choice but to go out and handle the affairs although he felt anything but prepared.

Ah yes, and there was one more thing to be done--that one thing he wasn't sure whether he hated or loved. He did have a choice, though, because he could have ordered the damn blood to be delivered in bags. It's simple really; he can heat it up and then pour it into a beautiful glass and make the whole ritual quick and painless.

The ugly truth was that he missed the intimacy. He missed his wife so much, her embrace, her wonderful touch, and the true feeding was the only thing left. It was like a fossil from some ancient times. Love-making was out of the question for sure, but feeding was necessary so he felt less guilty about it. At least that was what he told himself.

He knew Mia for at least a year now. She was a regular, meaning she fed him up to four times per month, but lately, he either indulged the true feeding more rarely or he met with Marija who has come to him recently. At first, he refused to accept anyone new into the household, but Mia couldn't handle the feedings alone anymore. He did understand, but it hasn't been easy to find someone else.

Fortunately, it was Mia who greeted him in the hallway once he opened the door. She looked beautiful in elegant black pants and a beige short-sleeve blouse that managed to compliment her skin. She was tall, with long blond hair that fell slightly below her shoulders, and her blue eyes had a piercing stare that reached deep under the surface. They dominated the rather small face but her full lips didn't fall far behind. She was a truly beautiful woman who proudly wore her 45 years of age, and he wondered if any of his flock kept a special eye on her.

" How are you my dear?", he smiled and then kissed her hand. She blushed and her face lit up with happiness.

"I am so happy you came back safely.", she whispered and then kissed him on the cheek. He appreciated the gesture but it did make him feel slightly uncomfortable. He knew she wanted more out of their relationship but once he explained how he felt she settled for what they had now- an intimacy that fulfilled them each in a very different way.