I'm thinking of buying a condo in New Mexico

      I'm thinking of buying a condo in New Mexico as a vacation home for my family of four. Both my children, Leonardo and Raphael, are only mine, not my wife's. And before you call me a misogynist, I mean that in a literal sense. They are the byproducts of two heavenly instances of intercourse I had with my cousin, who has long passed away since Thanos snapped. My children are abominations that can never be accepted into society, that is why they stay hidden...in the shadows.
     Back to the matter at hand however, I am hesitant to purchase the aforementioned condo because my wife is sleeping with our pool boy. I'm sure she would miss him very much if we were go a great distance away on vacation for months without his presence. But... then again...she may finally do the deed with me! Wifey has always hated me since I quoted Twilight while seeing her and the pool boy getting it on. I am undeserving of such an independent queen. I bow down on my hands and knees.
WOOF! WOOF!
I kiss her succulent footsies.
SMOOCH! SMOOCH!