Memories

Memories: Chapter 8

 Like ten years later, right? Sorry I took so long!! Sorry, I gotta upload this, but I woulda wait but I have a dead line of five minutes because I don't go to bed at 9:30 (like what the flapjacks!?) but when my mother's angry she grows claws, fangs, and scary mouth so... yes...

Okay make that less than four minutes.

All right love you guys!! I'll try not to take too long next time!! AHHH 3 minutes!! Stupid fingers stop typing!!

Song today: City by Sara Bareilles

FB page in external link!!

<3 

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I had spent most of the night sitting in the same spot on the floor, until getting up to walk to the window. I sat there again, and thought. This time, I didn’t try to envy all of the things that were out there. This time, I was thoughtful.

I spent the majority of the time there staring at the moon. I always found night beautiful. I didn’t know why, I just knew that I did. It was something about the way each individual star had a different shine and orb of light glazed over them. The way that they floated high in the sky, how they were unable to be reached, unable to be touched, unable to be stood by. It was how they twinkled, like the eyes of a young innocent child with a destined hope to be their best. Like the pleading eyes of one who has done wrong and wishes forgiveness. Like a doomed citizen praying for the end to not be now, willing to give anything in a return.

That was just how they looked to me. I half smiled at the words of my brother.

Each star is a different person, Lee. When someone’s born, a new one appears, just as when someone leaves, it goes away. It’s still there though; it’s just unseen to us all the time instead of just when the Sun’s up. When one shine’s extremely bright, it’s because that person that the star stands for is amazing. It shows they have potential, and a heart, and can care and love and be tender. Don’t laugh at me, because I don’t sound like mom.

I smiled, remembering the eruption of giggles that started within me that day. He’d rolled his eyes at me, but I knew that he was smiling too.

Oh, hey. Hey, hey Aemilia? Aemilia — shut up. I’m tryna’ be emotional and crud right now be quiet. So, anyways, you see that one right there? The star that is shining the brightest? . . . That one’s you Lee. That’s you.

I hadn’t believed him then; I still didn’t now. How could I be the  one shinning the brightest? I didn’t shine at all. It was impossible to think my star did. Either way, I had hugged him tight to me, falling asleep on his chest. I had seven years old when he told me that. My half smile grew when I remember what he’d said when I wouldn’t go to bed.

Dang it Lee, mom’s going to kill me you know. . . That only made you want to stay up more, didn’t it? God, you live torture me. Some piece of work . . .

I drew my legs up again and rested my head on them. I thought for a while longer. Then I started to cry. But then I laughed. I laughed. It felt so good to do that. I don’t know why I laughed, I just . . . wanted to, I guess. Or I guess that I needed to laugh . . .

I lifted my head and gazed out of the window again. I looked at the moon, the trees, the lake, the night sky; everything. I was always turning back to the star though. I kept searching through them, wondering if I could find anyone I knew. If could find him and prove to him that he was the star that he pointed to that day. That I was a dwarf, slowly fading into nothing, and unseen by those down below because of the dimming light that was barely there.