THE LIGHT IN THE DARKNESS - BWS

twenty-six

Three days had passed since William told me he was leaving. Three days and he still wasn't back. That feeling of emptiness I felt the moment he left hadn't left me since, and kept on growing. I truly felt like a piece of me was missing, despite my strongest efforts to rationalize my feelings. I didn't have any explanation for it, all I felt was a hollow void inside of me. I felt alone like I never felt before, despite spending most of my time with Caelan and Dee. And I felt weak and tired all the time. I hadn't been able to do anything during our training sessions, breaking a sweat barely five minutes in and needing a break every hour. It was getting worse and even Caelan was starting to worry.

    "You should see a doctor," Caelan said as he placed a hand on my forehead. I pushed his hand away.

    "I'm fine," I answered, still panting from the effort it took me to focus on fixing that damn glass. I was sitting on the armchair near the fireplace after my legs failed to support my weight. "I just need a break."

I grabbed my water bottle and drank half of it in one go. All that concentration was affecting me more than I wanted to admit. Maybe this was proof I wasn't who they thought I was, that I wasn't capable of fixing anything after all. Clearly it wasn't working, and I was growing weaker as the days passed. But I wasn't going to let them know that. Veronica would take too much satisfaction out of it.

    "You're not fine, Lottie," Caelan said, crouching in front of me. "Have you seen yourself lately? You look like a ghost, and you can barely even hold yourself up anymore."

    "She's just not strong enough," Veronica gibed. "I told you she's weak. She's a waste of time."

    My eyes met hers, full of disdain and disgust for me, but for once I didn't answer. I didn't have it in me to fight her. Because after all, wasn't she right?

    "You're not helping," Caelan answered, his gaze still focused on me. He looked torn, and I wondered what made him feel like that.

    "I'm okay, I promise," I told him, ignoring his sister. "I think I'll go lie down for a bit." I got to my feet, my vision starting to blur at the sudden movement. I quickly closed my eyes to keep my balance while everything around me seemed to swirl.

    "You were saying?" Caelan said and I felt his arms take hold of me, and suddenly my feet weren't touching the ground anymore. My eyes flew open, the room still dancing around me. I shut them again.

    "Put me down," I ordered him while I focused on my breathing to stop my head from spinning so much. "Put me down now!" I commanded again after he refused to do so and kept on walking towards what I realized was the staircase.

    "You are not fine, and no matter how hard you try to convince me otherwise, I won't let you down before you see a doctor."

    I growled in frustration, but I was too weak to fight him, so I let him carry me to my bedroom where he delicately put me down on the bed.

    "I just need a nap, not a doctor," I argued but Caelan was already on the phone and leaving the bedroom. I let my head hit the pillow. I was so tired, and cold, despite the summer temperature. I slid under the duvet, quickly joined by Dee who followed us back to the bedroom and let my eyes close for a second. Surely a little nap was all I needed to be back to my normal self.

    I woke up to a soft voice calling my name, and a hand stroking my cheek. William was back. My heart started to race in my chest at the thought. Race? No, that wouldn't be an accurate description. My heart seemed to only beat slightly faster. I wasn't feeling any warmer, or any of the tingles I usually felt around him. Something was wrong. My thoughts started to clear, and I realized I was still as tired as I had been in the training room. I forced my eyes to open and was faced with Caelan sitting on the edge of the bed near me, the worried look he had earlier today still shading his features.