all too well

here we are again, where nobody had to know

Happy Holidays, everyone! Again, thank you so much for the kudos and the kind comments y'all give! It's kind of saddening that I'm in here when the fandom is already half-dead, but, we just have to live with what we can get, besides, I don't even want this monstrosity reaching Rob, or even Sjoerd, hehe. 

Slight trigger warnings up in this chapter for internalized, and period typical homophobia.

*** 

Winter, 2006

Every color that once adorned the trees are now gleaming white. The atmosphere is frosty, and every breath is a huff of warm air. People either walk fast because of something they need to go to, or to escape the cold.

The seasons have changed, and what was once Jesse's spot, is now a place that holds a special memory. It's not particularly just Jesse's spot anymore, it was theirs.

Rob has to go back to Radboud, and he has joined the DWAR. They still find the time to see each other in between their studies, as they soon discover that the kiss by the river was just the tip of the iceberg. It's like a drug, Jesse thinks, once he gets the taste of Rob's lips, he just keeps on wanting more. As if every kiss they share before they need to part ways, he just wants to taste him again.

There is also the thrill of the chase, the secrecy. Jesse still doesn't know what to label himself. (Maybe you are bisexual, Rob helpfully supplied to him during that one night, where Jesse made the error of letting Rob use his mouth on other than kissing him).

Maybe he is. Jesse still thinks of his attraction to Jolein, but then he remembers how Rob's smiles and kisses make him want to burst.

He didn't ask Rob how he sees himself. It wasn't his place. As long as Rob still sees him, and kisses him senseless, it's all good..

***

Rob was sitting at the dinner table, listening to his father recount the story of how the local mayor didn't truly know his constituents enough to issue an order on the taxation of real estate, when he remembers that it's been months since he and Jesse started dating (Are we dating? Is that what we are?), and his parents still think Jesse is just his best friend.

Suddenly, the front door opens, and Rob's sister, Nicole, walks in, carrying only a backpack.

"Hey, Robbie. Didn't know that Radboud allows boys to have long hair." She then ruffled Rob's hair, making the man huff in exasperation.

"Stop doing that! I am not a kid anymore." Rob turned to his parents. "You didn't tell me the little menace is coming home."

"I heard you!" Nicole shouts from upstairs.

"Nicole got an early winter break, and she then decided to go home, rather than staying at the university", Rob's mother explained.

Nicole comes rushing downstairs, as Anton finishes setting up plates and utensils for her. She plopped down on the seat to Rob's left. She grinned at him. "So, where is he?"

"He?" Rob looked at her as if Nicole was speaking another language he cannot understand.

"Come on. The boy you always talk about. The one Mom and Dad talk about, that one who is always here during summer breaks. Is he cute?"

"My friends are off limits to you!"

"Your friends aren't all that pretty or handsome anyways, but maybe this new guy is."

"Hey!"

"Children settle down." Rob's mom was laughing. "I can't believe you haven't told Nicole much about Jesse yet, Rob."