Sex Addict

smoking

S M O K I N G.
C H A P T E R VI.

"You can die you know."

"Calum, don't do that."

"I'm just reminding you, smoking like this will kill you. You go through almost an entire packet a day. You have so much to live for." Calum explains to the distraught boy.

"I meant," He huffs dropping the cigar into the ashtray, "Don't sneak up behind me."

"Oh, sorry. For sneaking up behind you not for telling you the truth."

Ashton laughs standing up to open the windows in the house. He never smoked in doors but Michael wasn't home so why walk into the sun. The australian summers were rarely ever nice ones. Always too hot Ashton thought. "I've been doing for as long as I can remember. I can't just quit on instant."

"You being addicted to sex or just you smoking all the time?"

"Both I guess, but mostly the sex. It started when I was a kid. I've just been doing all the time. Not sleeping with people but just jacking off. I started 'sleeping around' at the end of eleventh grade. So many things happened that year I just couldn't cope with it." He explains to Calum sitting back down across from him. He didn't know why he was explaining it to him though. Of course Michael knows everything because he was there and went to school with him but Calum was just some guy.

"Did you ever think of help, actual therapy?" Calum pesters with his questions. He wants to help him but he really can't help Ashton without Ashton opening up.

"I thought about it but I never had the money, those things cost money. Also I had school, I wanted to graduate school." Ashton says rolling his eyes, what kind of question was have you thought of getting help. Of course he had thought of it, no 16 year old should be having sex almost every other night that wasn't healthy.

"Okay, I get that. But have you ever thought about sexual transmited infections or even aids. You don't have money for a therapist so I'm pretty sure you don't have money to cure yourself from aids. Why wont you stop it?" It made him feel miserable, if he could say, yeah he liked Ashton. But there was no way possible he was going to sleep with a sex addict. What if he moved on and found someone better?

"I'm not addicted to the sex, it's the feeling of being cared for that night. I have someone caressing me, telling me they love me for an entire night. What more could I ask for. I have thought about getting HIV and Calum I really don't care. I'm going to die one day why not it be sooner than later at least." Ashton says bluntly, Calum asked for it and he was getting the honest truth.

"I'm sorry if this I guess upsets you in any way but isn't it disgusting. Yeah, I'm sorry but becoming addicted to something like that is sick." Calum says shaking his head with disgust. He's lost pretty much a remorse for the boy in front of him.

"You wanna know something?" Ashton asks Calum taking a moment until the kiwi boy nods his head. "Since I've met you, which has been almost two weeks and four days ago. I haven't slept with anyone else. That's the longest I have ever gone without sex."

Calum sighs, tugging a hand through his hair. "But why?"

"Honestly Calum, I've lost all hope, all means to live anymore. Michael is everything to me but I just don't have that light source anymore. I live in a dark world."

Calum walks towards him, placing a hand on his lap. "Let me guide you, please." He says tilting Ash's chin, looking him in the eye.

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a/n shoutout to Alandra, for making my weekend 1000x better   

eww short chapter I know but eekkk i'm so excited for the next one