graveyard of buried souls

forgive me for being a sinner

[ warning: blasphemy of Christian beliefs ]

i am selectively religious.

i can clasp my begrimed palms — press them together until i could sense the sweats of my burning skin and unrelentingly repent for the sin that i have recklessly committed. i can drop both my knees onto the tainted floor and surrender to His almighty power of punishing the sinner in me that incessantly lingers along the temptations of my fucked up soul. i can bow and worship His divinity; deify His words and perceptions until the darkness of my tarnished psyche has been triumphantly defeated by His light.

i can, but sometimes, i choose not to condone the wrongs that have been done beyond its right; again, i am selectively religious.

i believe in Him, however, once His devoted worshippers had commenced to live by the sacredness of the bible — nourish each and every word that has been scribbled, and inhale every page as if it was the air they breathe, then, i am afraid that predicaments cannot be forestalled from inaugurating. for who is God if the bible states that homosexuality is as sinful as murder? who is God if His own believers have become inhumane enough to treat a man, who adores a man, and a woman, who glorifies a woman — as a sinner of its highest degree?

have i committed a sacrilegious act for being a human who have uttered blasphemies which contained of the truth? am i supposed to be punished severely and be thrown unto Satanʼs hellhole for being a sinner of irreverence towards such a holy name?

if so, then forgive me for being a sinner.

HEAR ME, OH, GOD. IF YOU CAN FORGIVE YOUR WORSHIPPERS FOR DEFYING HUMANITY, THEN I EARNESTLY COVET THAT YOU CAN FIND IT SOMEWHERE IN YOUR HEART TO FORGIVE YOUR CHILDREN
FOR FINDING ROMANCE IN SOMEONE WITH THE SAME REPRODUCTIVE ORGAN BETWEEN THEIR THIGHS.

because if He canʼt, then i refuse to believe in God.