Heartache

Tour

Nikki

Tour has been great so far. I love the experience and meeting everyone.

I've been on tour for half a month now and I'm already in love with preforming more then I was before.

You don't understand how happy it makes me.

I didn't expect so many people to be in the crowd at each show. It's a sea of people with no end (well that's what it seems like).

It makes me sad to think that tour will come to an end in a few months, but I try not to think about it too much and just enjoy the moments.

I really miss Jaden too. I've hardly been able to call him to talk to him since I'm so busy. I'm sure he's busy too though, his careers going super well too!

I'm so happy for him.

I enjoy watching his tiktoks he posts once a while.

As for charli and Dixie, I'd say everything's pretty good.

Besides Dixie and griffin breaking up, their doing fine.

I'm super excited since their coming to my concert in Toronto today.

They have their own kind of meet and greet going on there.

I'd say everyone's doing pretty well. I know a lot since charli keeps on blabbing on and on about all the drama since he says I'm the only one she can tell.

She also called me while she was drunk after a party- I thought she learnt her lesson from last time but I guess not....

I don't mind, I'm just very happy right now.

"Erzaaaa" I called as we sat in the hotel room. We were working on new music since I really wanted too.

"What Nikki" he groaned with a hint of annoyance turning in his chair.

"Jaden isn't texting me back, what do I do?" I pouted throwing a pillow at him.

"Just wait for his reply, he's probably busy too you know."

"I know buy it's been hours. Last week would respond to my texts right when I sent them to him, but now he never answers" I sighed.

"Call him if you really want to then" erza shrugged.

Good advice but erza is being very annoying right now.

I called Jaden, he answered the FaceTime on the last ring.

"Hey Nikki what's up?" Jaden said. It looked like he was just in his room- and he did not just say 'hey Nikki what's up'-

Nevermind.... Don't think too much of it.

"I miss you jae" I sighed. "But I'm happy you answered! I love you" I smiled.

"Love you too babe. I was actually in the middle of something. Im really sorry, it was just something for work. Can I call you back later? I'll text you?" He said as my heart sunk into my stomach.

"Oh!..... Yeah sure. You can umm get back to work I'll call you later. Sorry for bothering you" I slightly laughed.

"sorry babe, I promise I'll call later. It's just really important" he said with a sad look in his face.

More important then me- bitch- I'm your fucking girlfriend and you're putting work over me 🙄🙄

"Haha it's alright" I shook it off trying not to get mad.

"I'll call you later, good luck tonight! Love you" Jaden gave me a thumbs up.

"Thank you, love you too" I said before hanging up.

I sat there in silence with the phone In my hand. I stared at the empty ceiling.

"Damn" Ryan said. I thought this birch was napping-

"Oh shut up bitch" I pushed him away.

"You guys will Be fine don't worry. Just focus On the good things, remember Jadens coming to your concert in a few weeks. Look forward to that" Ryan tried cheering me up since he could tell by my face I was frustrated.

"Thank ry" I sighed.

"Now let's get something to eat I'm hungry as fuck and melodys about to lose her shit" Ryan got up from the bed.

We all left the room and went to grab something to eat.

I tried forgetting about what just happened, but something was bothering me and I couldn't figure out what it was.

Oh well, I'll just look forward for tonight.

—————————————————————-

Hello....

It's been a few months since I've posted... um well I can explain.

So like yk school... boring school. Yeah that's been it. I also have some friends now.

I've been feeling not so good lately tho.

Like my stomach feels like shit.... And the shit goes in the toilet.

I feel lonely too bc I hardly have anyone to talk about.

I also think I have a hard time expressing how I feel irl. Like fr i just cant, it's impossible.

I miss posting on Wattpad bc I can just speak my mind and anything that's bothering me at the end of chapters without anyone who knows me irl finding out.

It's different saying things on here and in real like. Not in a bad way, but this account no one knows who I really am. I promise you I'm not some weird old person 💀 but when I post something on tiktok someone always finds out and makes fun of me.

My friends know I have a Wattpad account and one of my books has over 800k views-

I do see the comments still bc of my email but I never really go on this account.

I hope everyone's doing well.

I'm excited since I'm starting basketball soon. And I'm actually getting good minutes so...

But like I'm out of shape now since there's been a big break.

I'm also getting a dog. Idk when but sometime near summer I think.

I'm excited.

I'm also a kpop Stan now. That's a whole different thing. Like I'm not a toxic one so don't worry

Kpop is cool

But sometimes I think to myself. I'm obsessed with people I don't even know and will never know I exist except knowing I'm their fan.

And I'm an actual fucking loser bc I'm freaking out over some idols and I have nothing better to do with my life.

I spent $500 ducking dollars this month on kpop shit-

It's an issue.

Anyways like I think I'll post more

Sorry for being super inconsistent but like I'm trying

Have a good day everyone

Happy 2022 🤮

Stream 'the feels' by twice for more posts. (This song is all English don't wrry)