𝑠𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛𝑖𝑡𝑦 (𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑛 𝑥 𝑟𝑒𝑎𝑑𝑒𝑟)

f i v e

September 2022

Journal Prompt #5 - I know this started off as a tough week for you so I'll keep it simple. Just write how you're feeling.

Lost. I feel so damn lost, in every aspect of my life right now. But I'll be okay, I know I will.

☹☻☹☻☹☻☹☻☹☻☹☻☹

(Song: Intro by Khalid)

EREN

It's been five days since I've seen y/n, she didn't come to class on Monday and I haven't seen her around campus. I'm starting to think she's avoiding me and that I might've taken it too far this time.

I knew I was risking a lot by letting my emotions get the best of me that night, even though she's made it clear that she doesn't like me. For some reason I couldn't help for a moment and think that she did.

Fuck, what did I do? I should've just continued to fight with her about whatever she was annoyed about that day when it came to me.

I've been trying to text her the last few days, I gave it the weekend to let her settle and think about what happened and I knew she had homework to do. She won't even text me back.

Why do I give a damn? If she's not going to text me back and avoid me then I need to take the hint and move on.

I walked around campus for a bit before my next class and tried to keep my mind off of y/n but it wasn't working. Every part of me wanted to call her until she picked up the phone and told me what her damn deal was.

The phone began to ring and immediately went to voicemail. I turned the corner and ran into someone, "shit my bad." I looked down and saw Aly standing in front of me. She crossed her arms, "why haven't you called me back?"

"Do you wanna grab lunch before my next class?" I figured I could take her somewhere quick and just explain myself, y/n was right, I did need to be more careful. She smiled, "sure but who are you on the phone with?"

"Oh fffffuuuck! Dammit!" I hung up the phone and began to panic. Aly looked at me and frowned, "it was that girl, wasn't it?"

I looked down at her and took a deep breath.

-

Y/N

I hated hospitals, they gave me the heebie jeebies. The beeping that you can hear echoing from each room, the cries from families, the white floors and walls that are lit up with fluorescent lighting. It's always been one of my most hated places to go to.

I looked over at my sister and put my hand on her thigh as we waited in the waiting room to hear back from the nurses.

I turned my phone off so I could just focus on one thing at a time, I still could barely comprehend what happened between Eren and I Friday night. Then getting a call Sunday morning that my father had been in an accident and it wasn't looking too well just was the cherry on top of it all.

I loved my dad but I hated him all at the same time. He left my mother when I was younger, and she held her own as a single mother while he fucked off and did whatever business thing that was more important to him than his own family.

Although they were young parents, it never mattered to me. There was never any good excuse as to why he abandoned my sister and I.

It wasn't until my 17th birthday I got a random call from a number I hadn't saved in my phone and I picked up to him apologizing for being an awful father and that he wanted a relationship with me and my sister.