In my words

Proposal

Proposal: a plan or suggestion

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Whistling of the wind in the ear, it ringed with each swirl of gust in the sky. Humble though the moonlight sky could be, the night did not feel complete without the presence of it. As if the hands of one's lover being empty, no warmth whatsoever.

Poetic they said, romantic they said. Alas, all she expected from the night and it's silence was- peace. Bundles of paper work was piled up in her study, waiting to be stained in the ink of her name and her alone. A bundle that she had achieved with much of blood, sweat and tears.

Pen treated all of her achievements with much arrogance- for she believed it to be worthy of it. Maybe the self-doubt was still harboured within the corners of her heart's shadows but she deluded herself to be soaked in the pride and arrogance of her own achievements.

Achievements that kept her accompanied throughout the sleepless nights when no lover or friend kept her warm, the only thing that took the chaos away from her mind. She loathed working. She did. As much as she made sure to keep herself busy to ensure that she was never starved or begged anyone for mercy, she still despised working. There were days where she wanted nothing more than to just lay in her silk-like sheets and not see the dawn of another day.

Taking the aid of alcoholic beverages until she drowned herself senseless in them, treat her luxury not like a privilege but a lenient life she choose to live. But realising how miserable that actually sounded, Pen prefered overworking herself until she couldn't anymore. She could still vaguely recall seeing vibrant colours when her mornings were with a knock on her door, signalling the arrival of Ciel's letters.

Though they met through the participations in charity events and ball parties, becoming pen-pals was something not only she enjoyed, she found it convenient. So much peace, no pressure to please anyone or to feel the need to explain her complexities. She truly enjoyed the laughs she shared with Ciel. At the time, it was the only thing that provided her with some hope and peace to pull through the day.

Unfortunately...

It was a mistake on her part. She cared for him, to the extent of taking any hurling of abusive words from everywhere and not retaliate, to the extent of not minding being a villain in his life. A villain who wouldn't care whether he shed tears or not, a villain who wouldn't mind if his health was failing or not.

A villain who came in his life like a storm, turned everything upside-down and left without a trace of existence.

It oddly suited her. The mere thought of it made her leave a sprinkle of chuckle on her lips. After all, drowning every single life around her in tears was her ultimate goal. Saying that she wasn't a villain would be a stretch.

"Seems like you have finally lost all of your sanity, my lady."

The oddly familiar velvety tone ringed behind her. With a hint of surprise in her heels, she turned around with a silver of curiosity.

The velvety voice was indeed familiar. So familiar that she was acquainted with it. His droopy gaze hung lowly on the red liquid in copper glass that his long fingers held. Lifting his lids up, fluttering the silvery lashes like the very wings of pixies, his enchanting golden irises gazed at her. His signature aloof smile lacing his wet lips like usual. She may mistake his shimmering moonlight locks for someone else but not his gaze. The way his eyes bored into her, it was as if he was seeing through her and beyond. Gazing right into her soul, stripped of all curtains. Naked.