14: The Hurt

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Sometimes you see things by closing your eyes

a/n;; little sneak peak of the custom cover I've commissioned for my story! Follow @emichan.arts on Instagram, she's amazing!

arts on Instagram, she's amazing!

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Mauri looks completely stunned, his mouth slightly agape. ".. wh.. whats wrong?" He backs away from me to give me space. I use the flats of my hands to erase the tears staining my cheeks, my fingers scrabbling to push away the strands of hair plastered to my face. "I.. I c-can't do this, I'm ss-sorry" my throat fills with lumps as the words stream out.

I pull the linen cloth further over my body hugging it tightly as if it were a shield protecting me from the world. I hurriedly stand up, still clinging to the sheet. I grab my shoes and dress with my remaining free arm and scurry towards the door.

I turn back to Mauri, his face full of anguish. "I really am sorry" ...you have no idea just how sorry.

Escaping his room I close the door and break down in the hallway, not even caring that I'm completely naked except for a thin piece of fabric. I lean against his door, face red and puffy trying to catch my breath through the floods of tears.

"F/n!" I focus my vision through the tears. It's Levi.

a/n;; credit to unknown artist

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a/n;; credit to unknown artist

He grabs my arms, concern washed over his features. "What the hell happened? Are you ok?"

I draw my gaze up at him, big droplets of tears rimming my violet eyes. "You happened!" I yell in the strongest voice I can get out. I yank his hands away from me and dash to my room, closing the door behind me. I drop my sheet and rummage through my drawers trying to find the baggiest t-shirt I can find. I pull the material over my head.

A click of the door handle. "I can't leave you when your like this..." Levi soothes. He steps into my room, shutting the door behind him.

I feel my sadness boiling into anger. "You can't leave me when I'm like this but it's fine to just stop turning up to see me when you were the one good thing in my life! It's fine to talk to me like utter shit every day!" I scowl, feeling the heat rising in my face. "You don't fucking care Levi! You've made that perfectly clear to me! ...I on the other hand, can't..." My voice starts to break as I glare at him. His face looks soft... Hurt.

"I can't fucking get over you!" I scream as my body slips onto my bed, my head collapsing into my hands. He strides over and kneels next to me, running his hands through my hair, brushing the tangled strands away from my face. "You think I don't care..." He whispers. "That is the complete opposite of how I feel".

He uses his thumbs and palm to wipe my tear streaked cheeks. I still can't even look up at him.

"Why have you hated me all these years...?" ... I continue to look down, almost not wanting to hear what he has to say. He removes his hands from me.

"I know why you found me all those years ago..." He mutters, his voice now changed from the soft hum it was a few moments ago. What the hell is he talking about?

"What?" I'm so confused. "I randomly bumped into you. It was fate..." I respond. I can see his fists tighten. "Why are you still lying to me?!" Anger exuding from him.

"Your fucking dad continuously raped my mum because he was in love with her and when she refused him he fucking killed her!"

My head shoots up in horror to look at him. His teeth barred, "You knew that the whole time we were kids and never once said anything to me!" His pupils narrow, I can tell he's fighting back his emotions.
"I didn't believe him when he told me. I said there's no way you would lie about that... but then he took me to see you and your dragons. You lied about who you were. You are a fucking liar!"

a/n;; credit to aot Hajime Isayama

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a/n;; credit to aot Hajime Isayama

My whole body starts to tremble out of terror. I feel like if I say a word, he'll actually kill me. He stands up and grabs my chair, throwing it against the wall. "I gave you everything I had f/n! I promised you the world... and you are nothing but a disappointment" his voice cracking as the words come out.

"Levi... I didn't know..." my voice is so quiet I don't even know if I've imagined saying it. "Who told you I knew about your mum? ...I honestly didn't..." my head starts to hurt from the amount of liquid I've lost through crying. I stand up and brave the walk towards him. I place my hand gingerly on his arm and he flinches.

"Kenny.."

Fucking Kenny!

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