When the Heart is Ash (I'll Savor Your Warmth)

Blaring Heat

There's something terrifying about silence.

Maybe it's to do with the unknowingness of everything. If everything is quiet, then you can't hear what's going on and, therefore, can't save yourself when things go wrong.

Shouto's always been burdened with Endeavor. He's pretty sure the first time he was really beaten was when he was just four, which is a sad truth. By then, he hadn't yet learned to protect himself. He'd simply let it happen, confused with what was going on.

He told mama, she didn't do anything. Couldn't, now that he looks back. She was just as defenseless as Shouto was.

Everyone was defenseless when it came to Endeavor. Fuyumi and Natsuo were avoidant, that's how they came out unscathed. Mom was too, after her days of trying to protect her family were over. She was still scarred, in the end. Mentally, at least.

Shouto couldn't avoid. He also couldn't confront. The only real thing he could do was listen. Become plaint.

Father took advantage of that, shaped Shouto into something he'll never be able to overcome. Shouto is still haunted by the hits he took, and for what?

He protected his mother, took those hits for her.

And she burned him, something he never thought could be possible.

Shouto sat in silence for about three hours after the incident in the classroom. He still has to write an apology essay to Cementoss and give it to him after the break ends. Aizawa had grumbled something about Shouto deserving an apology, and that a teacher should've known not to grab a student clearly having a breakdown.

Shouto's phone vibrates next to him, shaking his table. He drops his pencil onto the blank letter paper and answers.

"Shouto! You're off for ten days, right?"

Shouto picks his pen up back up, twirling it in his hand the way he's seen Uraraka do. maybe you just don't know yourself that good

"Yes."

"Dad said you didn't say anything about coming home, so why don't you pack and we can all stay at the house? Natsu's on break, too. It's super convenient!" There's the jingling of bells on her side of the phone.

"What are you doing?"

Fuyumi giggles, "I'm helping dad decorate the house."

His heart squeezes in on itself. Endeavor has never decorated for Christmas. Shouto's never celebrated, even.

"Melt all of the snow in the yard and then you can come in. I want to watch," he says, arms crossed.

Shouto shivers, goosebumps settling on his skin. It's cold, his quirk defends against it most times, but it still affects him.

Father waits inside while Shouto tries his best to heat up his left side. He just got his quirk a few months ago. He doesn't know how to use it all the way and it's so hard to learn. Father hits him when he doesn't listen.

"Isn't Christmas on the 25th?"

Fuyumi clicks her tongue, "Right, you've never really had a Christmas before, have you?" She pauses, saying something to Endeavor. Shouto wants to bet the bastard can hear him. "You're supposed to decorate pretty early in the month. I already did mom's room with the nurses, it looks super cool."

Shouto perks up, "How is mom?"

"She's doing so well! She can't wait to see you again, sometimes you're all she talks about," Fuyumi feigns inconvenience. "She's sad you can't get out more often, though."