if you find this ( DISCONTINUED )

One - Someone to nerd with

I cannot believe I'm actually going to do this. It's one of the most idiotic ideas myself, Pete Wentz, has ever come up with.

And that is saying a lot.

This is more stupid than the time I used rock-hard gel in Toro's hair, and then left the bottle in my bag - wide open. It's even more stupid than when I took my best friend Gerard to a tattoo parlour as a birthday surprise... without realizing he was deadly scared of needles. Lets just say the four hours it took to get him to stop shaking and calm down a tad were not worth it.

Yeah, even more stupid than that.

I'm going to leave a phone number - my phone number - inside one of my favourite books, Gray. Why? I don't even really know.

I guess I just want a friend.

Yeah yeah, cue the violins and old ladies wiping their tears. It's not that I don't appreciate Gerard, its just he doesn't really understand me. If it makes sense, we're more friends because of circumstance than because we actually want to be. I'm what you might call 'popular', and Gerard is as well, so of course if we weren't friends it wouldn't really make sense nor be functional at all. And sure, all my 'friends' are great for when I feel like partying or having some fun, but I need someone who understands me for me and not the person I have to be to impress and wow everyone else. I need someone who won't judge me by the clothes on my back or the things I have to do, but by what's in my heart.

But anyway, I guess the reason I am leaving my number is because, well, I want someone to nerd with.

But you didn't hear it from me.

Yes, I Pete Wentz, am maybe-possibly-okay-definitely, a nerd myself. My black bangs and leather jackets might be a bit misleading, but really I love books and comics and fiction but also non-fiction, and long words that feel powerful on your tongue when you speak them, and I guess I just love knowledge. The feeling of having something finally click into place in your brain is just so satisfying.

But again, you didn't hear it from me.

Of course, I'm not stupid - I realize that if the news of the Pete Wentz being anything less than a complete and utter renegade got out, my life would be automatically ruined. I could be turned into one of those losers who are just so easy to pick on and mess with; Someone like Toro, Stump, Ross or any of their little weirdo friends. And I have worked my ass off to ensure I am where I am now - I'm not prepared to lose it all that easily.

I've tried internet friendships before (and no, not everyone on the internet is a 40 year old man who still lives at home and lives for Harry Styles' selfies) but they just seemed pointless. Everyone I tried to speak to either faded out after a few conversations, or were completely different to me. As soon as they found out I went to parties and didn't spend all my time on the internet on tumblr - or worse, reading fan-fiction - it was like I was a completely different species and was unsafe to communicate with.

I ran my fingers along the book, ruffling the pages as I weighed the pros and cons of putting my number in here. What if someone recognized the number? What if someone thought I was a stalker and reported my number to the police? What if someone totally uncool or a blackmailer found it and threatened to tell everyone?

Relax Pete, no one looks at this stupid book anyway.

Besides, the rare amount of people that bothered to give Gray a second glance were mainly teenage girls as their 'idol' or whatever wrote it - who knows, maybe the girls who enjoy this type of book are intelligent and cute.

Glancing at my phone, I notice it's getting pretty late and the library will be closing soon. I pull a piece of stray paper out of my bag and quickly scribble my number along with a message: "Hey, if you find this, text me if you like this kind of book... please." Quickly realizing how desperate that sounds, I scribble out the 'please' and replace it with a :).

Now I can only wait.