For 'Beta' Or For Worse

Prt3: Chapter 3

"Dead" 
He repeated, this time facing me directly.

I didn't know what to say, I wanted to apologize for his lose but I wasn't sure I should, I don't want him to feel like I'm sorry for him.... I mean I am but let's not make this weirder than it already is.
I rest my hands on his knees and give it a light squeeze.

"I killed him"
He said in a tone low enough for me to hear, his face was void of emotions but by the way he clenched his fist I could tell that he was trying to keep it together.

My hand froze, I couldn't remove it from where it was rested on his knee, It was almost like all the blood was drained from my face.
Damn...I've always known that this dude was creepy, fuck! the whole pack is creepy. Is he some kind of psycho mate killer?
Okay calm down Raven let's not jump into conclusions, there's definitely a logical explanation...right?
I tried to remain calm, I diverted my gaze so he doesn't read the scared expression that fought it's way to my face, now that I think about it, I think that I was just too scared to remove my hands.

"I don't expect you to understand me, but I'm asking you to please not judge me. look Raven things aren't as easy as they seem. Phoenix pack does things I'm not proud of to remain at the top, some day I hope to be able to explain things to you"

I don't fucking want to understand! if it involves me killing my mate, which I'm not sure I've found yet, I have no interest in learning their customs.

Mehn I need to get out of here...

"Please don't look at me like that..." this time his voice wasn't has firm as before, his head was hung low. He placed his hands untop of mine, sending cold spikes up my spine.

"it's okay...I don't know what lead to the whole mate slaughter, but I'm sure it wasn't easy for you either"  My mouth said but my thoughts were all over the place

At least you're not the one that's dead

He smiles at me squeezing my hands tightly, and I forced a weak smile back.

Poor guy I don't even know how he's still alive after KILLING HIS MATE!
I actually don't much about this guy, yes I've been training with him for the past four years but we usually don't converse outside the training arena.

"are you okay? " I asked and he nodded in response
We spent the next five minutes in silence, occasionally sneaking glances at each other, for clearly different reasons. I have finally been able to retrieve my hands.

"Growing up I saw my gift as a curse" he stated out of the blue and I rolled my eyes,
tell me about it.

"Other wolves could fly, turn things into...things all I could do was break bonds, mate bond to be exact" He finished staring directly at me as if waiting for a reaction.
And he got one.

Wow slow down...

"wait, all these time I thought your gift was to inflict pain? " I stood up, a little bit too fast because I could see the hurt expression on his face.
He nodded
"Once the bond is broken the werewolf feels unimaginable pain, not much people know this, truthfully only Drulock knew" He took a deep breath "and now you"
He has such soft features, his face was mostly void of expression but a lot could be read from his brown eyes.

That must be why he survived this long without his mate, he probably broke the bond.

He chuckles awkwardly "It isn't that bad, I can also create false mate bonds, if that counts...i don't even know why I'm even telling you all this" He buries his head between his hands. I wish I could say something, anything to make him feel better.