In The Aftermath of Us

For The Great Love of My Life

*set in that parallel universe, where it will always be them, (also Elliot was never married, so he doesn’t have any kids of his own)*

    The day was new as the rays of the sun bled through the satin curtains of the room. Its light met the exposed caramel skin of my shoulder, kissing it with the warmth of a new day. Eyes fluttering open, as I felt my body breathe new life, to match the new day. Turning my head ever so slowly to the body next to me, a soft smile graced my features. While a chuckle escaped me as I watched as a bird did its prey as his chest rose and fell with each breath he took. A gentle snore floated through the air, as I positioned myself to rest my head in the crook of his shoulder. Snuggling closer as to steal his body heat, that and not wanting to rise from my place in bed to start my knowingly stressful day of work. What I would give to freeze time and stay forever in this moment with him. One where it’s just me, just him. Nothing complicated about it, love and peace in a single moment in time. To transcend the horrors and the depravity of the human race, that is painted in my mind's eye every other hour of the day. 
    “Babe,” I faintly stated as I traced my fingers up and down his chest, “You have to get up, or we are going to be late, we have to wake up the kids.”
    Mutters of protest, as his body slinked away from mine was all I got out of him. As his body settled back into its groove in the mattress. One thing was for sure I never got over how childish he was in the mornings. Having as much of a stubborn attitude towards waking up, as our 7-year-old son did towards his homework. As if on cue, I heard the creaking of a door down the hall. As the old hinges squeaked in defiance to having been forced to part with the molding. Pattering feet on the old hardwood floors never failed to engender butterflies in my stomach and in my heart. This was my life and I would never, and I mean never take it for granted. Even on the days that run me down and drain every last drop of motivation from my body, even on those darkest days. I wouldn’t change it for the world. For what would my life be like without the other parts of my heart? Dismal. Or at least I suppose that’s what it must be like. A second door, this time from across the hall opened, as I nudged my shoulder into the back of the man lying next to me. This time with more command in my voice. 
    “El, babe, please, both the kids are up, you know how they get.” 
“Five more minutes,” was his only reply.
Lifting myself from bed, I heaved my tired bones from the comfortable confines of my dream-infested mattress. Tiptoeing my way to the bathroom, wherein I brushed my teeth, and washed my face, clearing the tiredness from my features. Making my way to the closet, grabbed a pair of black slacks and a maroon ruched top, foregoing my suffocating blazer for today. 
Gliding towards the door I turned back as my fingers tousled with the doorknob. Resting my head ever so gently against the molding. A soft smile spread as serenity joined in, watching the man in bed remain asleep. This was my life, a husband, a son, and a daughter, it finally hit me, similarly to many mornings how lucky I was. Cragen before he stepped down asked me to do something with my life. To live for more than just the job. Scanning the pictures that hung on the walls of the room I think I have managed to do just that. Eleven years later, here I was, braver than ever, more filled with love. No longer just a cop married to the job. But one that had sworn to spend the rest of her days fighting for the greatest love of her life.