Arranged For Me

Five: N

Micheal

“What’s your problem?” Theo asks. My irritation increases just by his question.

Dante laughs as I exhale the smoke from my cigar. “The man has blue balls, Theo. Leave him alone.’’

I pick up a lighter from the table in front of me and throw it at his head. “I don’t have fucking blue balls. Stop saying that.’’

Dante stands up and throws it back at me. “That fucking hurt!”

Seth stands up as he opens a white claw. “The correct word is hurted.” He says.

I pick up the lighter and throw it at the back of his head, just at his stupidity. Theo laughs, looking up from his desk. “Seth, you’re a jackass.”

Lily walks inside with a glass of water. ‘’Hi, Muffin! Hi, boys!’’

“Hey, sweetheart.” Theo says.

Seth points his finger at Lily and smiles. “L-dog!”

She smiles and waves at him. Dante nods to her. “How’s it going, short stuff?’’ he says, taking a seat back down.

Lily scoffs. ‘’I’ll have you know, I am five-foot-seven, thank you very much. It ain’t my fault y'all are practically giants, sugar.’’

I roll my eyes. “I don’t like you, Lily.”

She gasps as she sets the glass on Theo’s desk and walks behind his chair. “What did I do?’’ She asks, wrapping her arms around him.

I point to the smile that rests on his face. “This fucker is always smiling because of you. He’s supposed to be mad with me.’’ I glance back at the door where Carina, Valentina and Diana remain in the living room. “And I don’t like you either, Diana! Dante is fucking chump now!’’

‘’Fuck you, Micheal!’’ Diana shouts.

Lily frowns. “Well, Mike, I know you don’t mean that, so I’m not gonna let that get to me.” she kisses his cheek before walking towards me. “But it’s not right for you to go along and pitch a hissy fit because you’re not sexually active.’’ she responds and ruffles my hair. I swat her hand away and grumble in disapproval, causing her to giggle as she exits Theo’s home office.

Dante leans forward. "Who is this girl that has gotten you to stop being a man-whore for a week? Seriously, why make a bet that you know you can’t handle?’’

‘’My wife. And I didn’t actually think she’d agree to it. ‘’

They all bring their full attention to me. Pure shock was evident on their faces. "When the fuck did you get married?’’ Theo and Dante ask in sync.

I shrug. "That’s irrelevant. I’ll explain another time when the only thing I think about isn’t wanting to fuck the living-’’

"Extremely too much information, bro.” Seth says, cutting me off. “Who is she?’’

I glance back at the door and stand up with a sigh. Closing the door, I stand in front of it and fold my arms. “Audrey.’’ I mumble.

They lean closer. “What?’’

‘’Audrey.’’ I repeat. ‘

‘’Huh?’’

“I said it’s fucking Audrey!’’

Dante and Seth stand up abruptly. “Audrey? Like Audrey, Audrey?” says Dante.

My patience starts to decrease. “Yes.” I mutter.