Okay so hear me out: what if there was a different storyline in Stoneheart (Origins pt. 2)? I'm rewriting the part where Hawkmoth uses his evil butterflies to make his face and tell Paris some stuff, except that by this time he's Shadowmoth. Things might get a bit confusing but I hope you like it!
Stoneheart threw his head back, clutching his head like he was in infinite pain. Then a swarm of purple butterflies came out of his mouth and formed a big head.
The first thought that came to mind was, Why is it so UGLY? No, like seriously. It was literally a silver mask-like thingy with a purple spot over one eye. He looked bald, for stars' sake! And don't even get me started on his FACE. It was disgusting.
The head said, "You foolish girl. Do you really think you're saving Par- " I cut him off by shouting.
"No, no, it is you who is foolish. What monstrosity are you WEARING? You look like you just dumped a piece of fitted metal on your head and painted a purple spot on it. Seriously! You look practically BALD! It is HIDEOUS. Do you have no shame? And why the heck are you smiling?"
He frowned and looked down at me. "Now listen here, you- "
"No, YOU listen here, you pea-brained thing! I pity those poor butterflies who have to make this... this... tragedic bunch of trash! So, so, UGLY. How the heck are you not embarrassed in wearing this disgusting thing? If anyone sees you in public, they will definitely punch you hard just seeing this ugly outfit!"
By now, Chat Noir - I think that's his name - was rolling on the floor laughing. The crowd that had gathered was trying hard - and failing - to keep a straight face.
"Silly girl. You the one wrong here. How about I make a deal with you? Give me yours and Chat Noir's miraculous and I- "
"I WASN'T DONE YET, DUDE! Are you sure you aren't standing in a trash can? Because if you aren't, kindly tell me your location so I can carry you there myself! Such disgusting and trashy fashion sense belongs in the dumpster, with all the other trash!"
Everyone caught his utterly bewildered expression and laughed even harder.
"I really pity your miraculous and kwami! Imagine your miraculous sitting on a baggy shirt with holes in all the wrong places, and some sort of pants that look like a skirt! I wouldn't be surprised if you wear your socks on the outside of your pants! This is crime to our eyes, Mister-I-evilise-innocent-butterflies-for-fun!"
"My costume is NOT a tragedy, young lady." The akumas made a figure of a man with a cane. "You are all foolish. You are just mere children. You have no power over me. I am a very powerful man, inside AND outside of the costume and I could easily ruin- "
"Look, let's take a poll on how terrible your costume is. Everyone, be perfectly honest. Who here thinks this Shadowmoth's outfit is trashy and lousy? Hands up!" Literally everyone's hands went up except his.
"There, see that? Everyone thinks so! Heck, even your voice is nauseating and insufferable! It's like hearing a dead crow sing mixed with a maniac rooster laughing. It's making my ears bleed! You should be in jail for harrassing and bullying these poor innocent butterflies." I tore at my hair.
"Don't even get me started on your name. Shadowmoth. I can't tell, are you a shadow or a moth?! And you use a butterfly miraculous, right? So what do shadows or moths have to do with BUTTERFLIES?! Grow up, man! I would say that your logic is like a toddler's, but that would be an insult to toddlers. Where in the world is your brain? Did you sell it in exchange for this miraculous? There is absolutely zero sense in terrorising this nice city just for jewellery! Must you go back to kindergarten to regain your sense and logic?"
"I have enough power to destroy you when I find you, you silly- "
"And how are you going to do that when you don't leave your lair, huh? You just sit there waiting for negative emotions to come out! That's plain miserable. Your so-called 'lair' must be an old abandoned dumpster with paper butterflies made from old newspapers scattered everywhere on the floor while you sit there waiting. How old are you, huh? An old man with a cane for support who sits on the floor, hugging his knees, waiting for a random negative emotion? Supervillians actually have to come out of wherever they are to actually cause much damage. Even the Joker is better than you. You know,- "
He cut me off with some villian rant but he wasn't giving any more useful information, so I interrupted him.
"Blah blah blah, are you done yet?"
"No, I'm- " I purified all the akumas and I turned to the crowd of civilians and reporters who were gathered around and were having a hard time keeping a straight face.
"Ignore the old man's rambling, please. He's an idiot and a jerk. I mean, 'You are mere children'? Puh-lease. If we 'children' are so incompetent, why does he akumatise people and make us fight them anyways? In case you're wondering, I'm Ladybug, a new superhero in Paris. I mean, someone has to stop this old uncle."
I looked at the damage in Paris. It looked bad. Like really really bad.
"Man, bad luck follows me everywhere. If only I had my lucky charm I would- WARGHHHHHHHHHHH"
My yoyo started glowing and spinning and I accidentally dropped it on the floor.
Then a red piece of paper with black dots on it popped out of my yoyo.
I picked it up and it said:
Throw this lucky charm in the air and yell 'Miraculous Ladybug', it will fix the damage
So obviously I threw it in the air.
Why I decided to listen, I don't know but it worked.
Paris was fixed.
Don't tell me I have to do this every day.
Yay another chapter done! Stay safe guys!