About Last Night - HouseMD FanFiction - James Wilson x Original Character

15: Try to Let Go

It lasted about fifteen seconds. I made sure to run my hand through Chase's hair for good measure.
It was only when we broke apart that I realised the utter stupidity of what had just happened.
"I always knew you were after her," Wilson muttered, leaving the room.
"Awh, Chase, thank you," I said, "He's mad at you now, I'm so sorry."
"Eh, we weren't that close anyway," Chase shrugged, surprisingly okay with it, "Nice one, Claire, you're a... a very good kisser."
"As are you," I patted his back and left the room.
I walked into the bathroom, which was completely empty for once, and leaned on a sink. Then, I let out a laugh.
I was going back into the crazy angry phase and I needed to stop it early before it got worse.
"What's funny?" a voice made me jump out of my skin.
I turned around, "Cuthroat- I mean, Amber, hi!"
She stepped closer to me, "You're Dr Byrne aren't you."
"Cool, my name tag works!"
"Don't get smart with me."
Amber looked at me like a lion stalking it's prey.
"I know you still want him," she growled.
"Uh... who?"
"James."
I shrugged, "I've got... someone else, I guess."
"I don't believe the Chase thing for a second."
"How did you know-"
"Listen, Byrne," Amber sighed, "I know you used to date him. I know he was crazy about you. But that ship has sailed very far away. You're too young for him anyway."
She left the room.
I laughed to myself again. She seemed competitive. But headstrong. If she wasn't dating my ex, we'd probably be good friends.
I left the bathroom, did some clinic hours, then went into my office and worked for a while.
There was a knock at my door at around 9:30pm.
To my utter shock, it was James Wilson, carrying the box of new eye-doctor equipment I'd ordered a few weeks ago.
"This came for you," he said, setting it down on the floor beside my desk.
"Thanks, Wilson."
He awkwardly paused for a moment, looking at me.
"What's up?" I asked.
He sighed, "See, I knew Chase wanted you. I didn't realise you wanted him too."
I shook my head, "I... uh... I guess I didn't know until he... called me while I was in Ireland and... y'know... told me."
I continued making up this whole story about how I was afraid James'd be upset so I originally said no, then I saw he was with Amber and so on.
James sat down across from me at my desk, "Are you... happier."
"What do you mean?"
"Claire, are you happier with Chase than you were with me?"
I sighed, "Are you happier with Cutthroat Bitch?"
He laughed a little, "Don't call her that."
"If you must know, I'm not happier," I said bluntly.
James smiled, "Yeah, neither am I."
"Yeah," I sighed, then smiled "Not a thing we'd have to ask ourselves if it wasn't for you."
He looked down at his shoes.
"Why'd you do it, James?" I muttered, "Why'd you ruin something so... wonderful."
James looked back up at me, "It was stupid. I was talking to the guys, y'know, House and stuff, and they kept trying to convince me I'd never done anything wild in my thirty-three years of existence. So, they convinced me to sleep with Olivia. I thought it'd be a one time thing... but it escalated."
"That's not good enough, James," I mumbled, my eyes feeling watery, "You could've just said no. How did it escalate?! Those guys don't control you. And I doubt House had anything to do with it considering I'm the only Wilson Girlfriend he actually likes."
"House didn't say much. She just kept asking and I kept thinking about how vanilla I've been my whole life," he put his head in his hands.
I sighed, "If there's anything you're not, it's vanilla. I'd know, I've slept with you."
James laughed, "That good, huh?"
I smiled, "The best."
"Better than Chase?"
"Dunno yet. What about me?"
"The best," James smiled at me, "I love you."
I shook my head, "Stop."
"But I do."
"I know."
I sighed and unpacked the box of equipment.
James helped me.
He pulled out a magnifying glass and inspected it.
"You look inside eyes with this?" he asked.
"Not inside, just closely, dummy, haven't you ever had your eyes tested before," I chuckled.
"Not in a few years. Here, let me see yours!"
We both laughed as he pretended to inspect my eyes with the glass.
He suddenly stopped.
"What's up?" I said.
"Your eyes..." he smiled, "They look greener up close."
I couldn't help but smile.
James placed a hand on my shoulder and kissed me. How I'd missed it. I relished in the kiss. Melted into it.
I ran my hands up through his hair.
We broke apart.
"No," I whispered, "We shouldn't."
"I love you," James whispered.
"I know I said things," I whispered, "You weren't just another guy to me. God, James, I'm so in love with you. But I just can't trust you. How can I?"
"No," he whispered, I could hear a slight tremble in his voice.
My eyes teared up, "Your eyes look lighter up close."
We smiled at each other with teary eyes.
"Please tell me this isn't it," James sobbed quietly.
"I'm sorry," I shook my head, "But it's not the same anymore. I can't stop seeing you too together. And now this other girl, it's just too difficult."
"What about Chase?"
I shrugged, "I don't know. I'm just not sure I can do this again without being afraid of getting hurt. It'll always be hanging over me. Over us."
James pressed his forehead against mine, "I'm sorry."
"I know you are," I cupped his face in my hands, "I am too."
He kissed me again. I savoured it a little.
"I should go," I said, turning away from James.
Both of us were a crying disaster now.
We looked at each other for a few seconds, then I left the room.
Walking away from him was the hardest thing I ever did.