Aleksander Morozova Imagined

Hidden in plain sight part 1

In honor of me finishing my AP US History exam, I'm giving you an update. 

Summary: Adrianna Cesarz and her brother, Pervak Cesarz, work as servants in the little palace. The only problem the Cesarz siblings are Grisha. Unbeknownst to the Darkling Adrianna is a heartrender and her brother is a shadow summoner. As children, their mother warned them to never tell anyone of their gifts, even the Darkling. When the siblings were teenagers their mother died leaving them in the care of a family friend, Ivanna, that worked at the grand palace; Ivanna was able to pull some strings and get the siblings a job.

Adrianna's POV

2920 days, 96 months, 8 years. That's how long we've been trapped inside this gilded cage. Wake up, eat, scrub, sweep, eat, grovel, scrub, sweep, eat, sleep, repeat. Every day for the past 8 years I have followed this same dance. Never straying from the steps, too afraid to do anything else. Like running for miles only to be in the same spot. Time moving as slowly as molasses dripping down a silver spoon. Spoons that we should be sucking on too, but we have stuck to our promise. Living by mother's dying breath, "Never ever reveal what you are to anyone. Not Ivanna, not your friends, not even the Darkling. It is a death sentence to be a Grisha even if you are at the Little Palace, do not be distracted from that truth by the richest lies. Those second army soldiers are just as dead as the King's army. Promise me you will remember this." 

Like children we promised, swearing to never reveal what we truly are. Of course, Mama was right to be wary of the man (if he can be called that) cloaked in shadows, wielding the weapons of death and destruction. Bringing misery and strife with every move he makes. I have only seen him twice during our time here. He has never spared me a glance either time. I know I should be grateful for that like Pervak is, but I find myself no longer able to share his sentiments. Of course, I would never dare to expose us, I am too much a coward to even be in the same room as the Darkling much less tell him we are Grisha. Grisha that hid under his nose for 8 years and avoided conscription for 24 years. 

If I were to tell the Darkling who we truly were, we would be just as dead as the rest of them. His eyes hold the scars from battles long since past. The medals adorned on his kefta captured falling stars. Whoever-whatever- the Darkling is, it is nothing Pervak nor myself want to be ensnared by. We have watched countless Grisha students, boys and girls alike, fall for his tricks. I have seen too many young girls befallen by his schemes. The thought makes my skin crawl. The Darkling had been the Darkling for longer than we've been alive and yet now he looks younger than us. I suppose that is a part of being a shadow summoner. Pervak looks 5 years younger than me and yet he is 3 years my senior. 

Forever young is the curse of powerful Grisha. A curse that would be considered a blessing to those who have it; those afraid of death. Not myself, I welcome death. I wait for the day death shall come, kiss my cheek with her cold lips, and sweep me onto her silver horse to guide me to the making at the heart of the world. I long for the day I shall be reborn on this pitiful world. I wish to come back as a tree. My heart could not take it should I have to deal with the spokes of life and the ridiculous dichotomy of our society. The pitiful control we humans claim to have over our lives. 

In the end, it does not matter whether you were a king or a pauper, Grisha or otkazat'sya. We were all made in the same place and we shall all return to the same place. Pervak does not share my grim ideals. No, my elder brother has a sickeningly optimistic outlook on this thing we call life. So caught up in my own thoughts I hadn't paid attention to where I was going until I collided with something hard. 

The impact causes me to fall on my bum. The blood drains from my face as I look up at the Darkling. He is looking down at me, mild annoyance dancing in his grey eyes. I struggle to swallow the bile in my throat. He still stands in front of me not attempting to move. Behind him are two oprichniki stoic as always. The Darkling clears his throat making me look back at him. He cocks an eyebrow, waiting. I haphazardly get up, "I'm sorry Darkling I wasn't paying attention to where I was going." I bow my head before moving to walk past him. As I'm about to pass him his hand darts out grabbing my exposed arm.