Take me away

Love

When I wake up, I'm sweating. I don't know how that is even possible since it is still cold everywhere. Joe is nowhere to be seen and I'm laying alone. I feel the sweat on my forehead and push away all the blankets and shirts that are laying over my body. I still have no energy so there is no way for me to get up. I wipe off the sweat from my face with my sleeve but still my body is burning. I didn't feel that hot since we are here. I even wish that I would be cold again because this feeling is even worse.

"Joe?" I call for him since I still have no idea where he is. He wouldn't just leave me, wouldn't he? He doesn't answer. I feel so bad because I'm laying here on my own not even sure about what is happening to my own body and I know that I hurt him before. Maybe he is angry at me and left because of that. I made him leave me here. I don't want to cry but I feel like I can't help it. My eyes are already teary and I try to call for Joe again. Still no answer from him. I start to cry. Slightly but I cry. Tears are rolling down my cheeks and mix together with the sweat that covered my whole face. I want to stop crying but I'm just not able to. It feels like I cry about everything that happened in the last days since we crashed. I didn't cry after we crashed. This is the first time I cry since we are here and just now I realize how bad I needed to cry.

Just as I calm down a bit, I hear footsteps outside. My breathing stops for a second since I'm terrified. I don't even know why but I'm terrified. Someone comes in wearing a hood over his head. When he takes it off I realize that its Joe and my whole body relaxes for a second.

"Where the hell were you?" I scream at him and he seems totally overwhelmed by my reaction.

"I was just outside looking for something to eat because you were sleeping." He tries to explain and comes near me. He kneels down next to me and looks at my body. He then reaches out his hand and touches my forehead, feeling my temperature.

"Oh my god, you are burning." He says with a panicking face. His eyes wander up to my face again and he sees the sweat all over my face and then my red eyes.

"Were you crying?" He asks.

"Obviously I was."

"Why?"

"Because I thought that you left me." I shout again.

"Why would I leave you? I wouldn't survive alone either. I would never leave you here alone. I care about you too much to do that."

"You really care about me?" My voice is quiet. I feel like a child.

"Of course I do." He brushes some strands of hair out of my face. He looks at me like I'm some piece of art and I love that. I never had someone to look at me that way.

"We need to bring down your temperature." He says as he feels how hot my skin is.

"I will bring some snow from outside." He says before standing up and going outside. It only takes him a minute until he comes back with snow in his hands. I really don't want to have that on my skin but I know that its the only way to cool down my body again.

"I'm sorry." He whispered before putting the snow on my forehead and my stomach. I wince as the cold hit my still burning skin. It feels insanely cold but it is immediately melting on my skin. Joe looks at me the entire time until all of the snow is used up.

"Do we need more?" I look up at his face. He lay his hand on my naked stomach to check the temperature of my skin. In this moment I care more about his hand on my skin than about the temperature.

"I don't think so." He says and takes his hand away. I pull down my sweater again and Joe sits next to me. Just now I realize that his arm is bleeding.

"What happed to your arm? Are you hurt?" I ask and now I'm worried.

"Oh no, that's nothing. I was going through some bushes. I believe they had thorns. I tried to hunt something." He explains.

"You did what?" I laugh a bit as I hear him saying that he wanted to hunt.

"We don't have enough to eat. Do you have a better idea?" He frowns at her.

"No." I shake my head.

"We need to get out of here." He says.

"How? No one will find us."

"That is why we need to go by ourselves." He looks at me and I try to understand what he means.

"What? We should walk through mountains by ourselves?" I give him a questing look.

"Yes. Its the only way."

"Or we stay here." I say.

"And die? We have no food and its too cold to stay here that long."

"But at least we would be together." I say and he looks down on me with a tiny smile.

"I love you but I won't freeze to death with you here." He laughs a bit but I feel like he didn't realize what he just said. I did.

"What did you just say?" I ask him wanting to hear it again.

"I don't want to die." He is confused.

"No, the first part." I say again and this time he seems to realize what I'm talking about. He struggles a bit and I'm not sure if he wants to say it again. Maybe he didn't mean it. Still I wait for him to say something.

"Is it too soon to say this yet?" He asks me after a while. I feel like it is but I don't care.

"No." I just shortly say. I want him to say it again even though I know that I can't say it back.

"I love you." He finally repeats and I feel my lips forming into a smile. I really needed to hear that words again and I know that they were true.