Heaven - ONC 2022 LONGLISTED - old version

chapter 23: sacrifice

"For the life of the flesh is in the blood, and I have given it to you on the altar to make atonement for your souls; for it is the blood by reason of the life that makes atonement." 

The storm shook the house. It shook Heaven. It shook the whole world.

Caleb entered the kitchen. He was whiter than the plaster and when he saw Sina holding the blood-soaked towel, he grabbed onto the back of a chair so hard he nearly punctured the plastic.

"I'm such an idiot," Sina said remorsefully. "I bled all over your sink and ruined your towel. Damn it, I hope it wasn't your favourite one or anything."

As Sina spoke, all Cal heard was a terrible sound – like someone was slamming a hammer against metal. Between the thuds, Sina's words found him as faint as a whisper.

"I'm so sorry. I ruined a perfect night."

"You need to get out of here," Cal managed to say through a mouthful of saliva pooling around his teeth.

"I'll clean up. I'll buy you a new towel."

When Cal grabbed the chair with his other hand and scrapped it against the floor angrily, Sina shook his head. "Two! I'll get you two towels."

Cal's gaze moved spasmodically over the blood as it searched for the wound. "Sina," he choked out, "get out of here, now."

"Please don't get mad. I didn't mean it." Sina took a step closer but as he did, Cal thrust the chair between them, making him stop.

"Now!"

Tears stung Sina's eyes when he saw the strained look on Cal's face. An ache curled up in his belly when he saw how white Caleb's knuckles had turned as he tried to dig his fingers into the chair. "I thought you liked me. Why are you telling me to leave?"

The world got darker. Hail exploded on the ground then shards of ice flew up like confetti.

Father Cal knew he should have lied. He knew he should have told Sina he no longer wanted him around. But Sina's eyes were magnetic and Caleb remembered hos good he had felt when Sina touched him. It was like everything broken had been glued back together. "I do like you," he cried out softly. "I more than like you."

A few moments ago the worst pains Sina had felt had been the burn and the cut. But those were nothing compared to what he felt now – unwelcome, unloved, broken, and horribly in love. "Then why?"

Cal kept his gaze on Sina. Though he wanted to look away, he couldn't. "I know what you are."

Sina nodded. His bloody hand was held close to his chest. "I...I know you know. I told you. I'm a stripper. Not a very good one."

"No. The other thing that you are," Cal growled low. "Your blood calls to me. It's a serenade. A dangerous one."

Blanching, Sina shook his head. "I don't know what you're talking abo-"

"You're a demon."

"No. I, I..." Sina caught himself before a tear escaped. "I want to be loved. I'm not what you say."

Without a word, Caleb stripped off his collar, he rested it gently on the table before unbuttoning his shirt and sliding it off. Turning, he exposed his back and his wounds to Sina.

Sina gasped. "The fuck you're not. It's impossible."

A nod. "I am," Caleb sobbed as he kept his back turned. "And I am terribly unholy."

"No. No! You're not. You're a fucking liar, Caleb." Angrily, Sina threw down the towel and stormed over to Caleb. "You're a man. Human. You're not a –"

As Sina reached him, Cal turned and grabbed his wrists with such force Sina thought they would break. "I'm a Kadisin. I'm as human as you are, which isn't a lot."

The tears that Sina had held back before, spilled out of his eyes. They rolled down his face and spread over his lips before running down his chin where they leaped to their death. "I'm in love with you," he whispered almost inaudibly. "I know it's wrong, but having a place for you in my heart feels so right."

"I could kill you," Caleb said woefully.

"I know. Your collar almost did."

"I don't want to ever hurt you but your blood calls to me and I hunger."

Sina wrapped his arms around Cal's waist and rested his cheek against his back. "I offer it to you."

Before them, a small iron Jesus rested quietly. His eyes were cast downward, stuck in an eternal sleep. Yet He watched. He knew. He understood what others could not.

Turning, Caleb brought Sina's hand to his lips and touched it ever so lightly. A butterfly touch longing for blood and salvation.

While Caleb fed, Sina felt safe. Safe enough not to fear death were it to come to him in the shape of an angel. If he were to go, this is how he'd want to. "This isn't wrong. We are not wrong. Our sins are going to be things we carry but if I'm carrying them with you then I'm good." Touching his lips to Caleb's crown, Sina breathed him in. "I want to be with you forever."

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