a mirror in the sun ☼ l.s.

ten - double dates

The date was a disaster. A humiliating, mind-boggling, hurricane-sized disaster.

The omega was perfect. She laughed at all of his awkward attempts at jokes, and she only barely judged him when he stuttered his way through his order. She was polite and patient and beautiful, but Harry wasn't sure that he had ever felt more uncomfortable in his entire life.

It was like falling in the deep end after spending a lifetime trying to learn to swim: he recognized every single one of his mistakes, but they still dragged him beneath the surface, his lungs filling with water no matter how he flailed.

He knew he wasn't supposed to wish she would take charge instead of waiting for him to decide, but he quite didn't know how to stop wishing. Even for something impossible.

Maybe he would just never mate. He didn't need a bond to be happy, right? The thought of being alone for the rest of his life -- for the rest of eternity -- ate away at him, but it was far better to be alone than to be uncomfortable.

Right?

He kept his head down as he walked into school that morning, beelining for his locker to put his books away. Normally, he would try to find his friends and hang out with them for a while before their first class. Not today.

"Harry."

Harry startled, whirling around to face the familiar voice. He snapped back to reality like he had been physically hit. It was the first time that Louis had actually initiated a conversation with him all week. Harry had to blink a few times to make sure that the older alpha was really standing in front of him.

And he was. As always, Louis seemed larger than life, taking up space with the utmost certainty. His hair was still damp from his morning shower, a few dark strands dangling over his forehead. Harry almost wanted to apologize for blocking his own locker, like somehow, he was standing in the way of something that Louis wanted.

"Hi," he said, finally finding his voice. "I put your jacket in your locker on Friday. Did you find it? I tried to catch you before your class, but then you left before I could get there, and then --"

Every last atom of air left his lungs when Louis's fingers curled around his hip. It all happened so fast. In an instant, Louis had him pinned back against the lockers, one hand on his waist and the other beside his head.

"Louis! Stars, what are you . . ?"

"I've got to admit," Louis cut him off, his voice low. He leaned in close, his lips just inches from Harry's ear. "I was really, really fucking jealous."

Harry swallowed hard. The heat of Louis's body washed over his own, and he couldn't decide if he wanted to lean into the warmth or shrink away.

"Jealous?" he managed to stammer out, struggling a bit in Louis's grip even though he knew that there was no point. "You don't even know her. Why would you possibly be --"

"Not of you," the older alpha clarified. "I was jealous of her."

A shaky breath later, he was gone. Harry's skin tingled with the ghost of Louis's touch, craving less and more at the same time. Louis left Harry right there against the wall, unable to move yet unable to look away as Louis strided down the hallway away from him.

Goosebumps tingled down Harry's spine. He had a strange thought: he wished he hadn't given the jacket back so soon.

/

After school, he went to get food with Liam and Zayn. Niall was busy with his family. Louis was supposed to come with them, too, but for some reason, the older alpha didn't show up and didn't respond to any of Zayn's messages. They left school without him.