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Review: Prank Gone Perfect

Reviewer: Zo

Author: Park_Ara

Before I get onto the review, a little note; I tend to be extremely harsh or critical, so I hope that none of my words offend you in any way, and that you use them to better your story. Okay, let's go.

My first impression of the story is based on the title, cover and blurb. The title was nice and intriguing, because it's the exact opposite of prank gone wrong, and it was contradictory. The book cover, honestly, seemed like a mess. There's a dartboard, which I suppose indicates that the prank went "perfect". But I really have no idea why there was a dandelion in the corner (or was it supposed to mean fireworks?). The text is cut off, so the cover's dimensions are messed up. The title is exactly what it is, so no comments there. The blurb is an excerpt from the story, so I suppose it works.

The story is basically a crack-fic, and I have no idea why you would ask for a review for this story, because a crack-fic makes no sense whatsoever, and asking someone to review it will get you only negative feedback, because reviewers point out things that don't make sense in the story and are incorrect. But I will do what I was assigned to do, and I hope you aren't offended by my words.

The dialogues were in normal font, while the words after were in italics and I have no idea why the author put it like that, because all it did was confuse me, because italics are used only to emphasise certain words and phrases. Other than that, some sentences were inside parenthesis, and once again, I have no idea why that was done, because that's incorrect too, and not professional at all.

The grammar in this story is a mess. There's no kinder way to put it. There is no space between the punctuation, and that is majorly incorrect. The usage of some punctuation is also wrong. Excessive usage of punctuation is also present, which is like a headache to read, because saying <no!!!!!> and <i.........don't know!!!> is only acceptable when casually texting someone (they aren't excerpts, just an examples.).

Sentences phrasing is messed up in many places as well, and some words were also incorrect. There's no word known as cutted. The past tense of cut remains as cut, so does the past-perfect tense. And there are so many other errors, only in the grammar-aspect of the story, but if I elaborate on them all, we'll be here for a very long time. I would highly recommend the author to search for an editor and get the entire story revamped.

Not to mention, all the dialogues are framed, as if it were the script of a play, like

y/n : "dialogue dialogue dialogue"

jin : "dialogue dialogue dialogue"

which is again, incorrect grammar, so make sure to fix that too.

The author has added pictures in the story, which is extremely unprofessional. What's more, is that the author has proceeded to describe the very same picture attached. I would suggest that author removes the pictures and just leaves the descriptions of the pics, because that'll suffice.

I understand Hindi, so I was able to read the dialogues between Jin and the female lead, but the translations below weren't really accurate, so I would suggest either translate the sentences correctly, or not put translations at all. I understand that the author had added 'hinglish' to make the story more funny, so I won't say anything about it.

Now, onto the plot itself, I'd say that it was average, but had potential. However the execution wasn't that nice. There is a lot of confusion, because there are a lot of timeskips, and the flashback was rushed and hurried, and wasn't as nice as it could've been. Jimin's actions were... questionable, I'd say, because, well, it was really harsh, and his reasoning and following actions seemed really, I don't know, stupid? It honestly seemed like an Indian soap serial; unnecessarily super dramatic. That's the most accurate word to describe it.

Some things in the story made absolutely no sense. Jimin said that he's scared of his father and the things he'll do, which should make him dislike his father, yet he said that he loves his parents. That isn't a reasonable response. After Jin and the female lead give Jimin back to his father, they hug as if reunited after many years, which again, made no sense.

On top of that, his father asked him, and I quote, <"My son,where you were??" Mr.Park asked to,Jimin being worried.>. Three seconds silence here, because not only is the sentence framed wrong (I spoke enough about the grammar), why is his father even asking that question, when he was chasing Jin, and the female lead's car, and why is he worried, when he was literally threatening to shoot their car? Like, when I read that my face was like '???' *visible confusion*

To add on top of that, when Jimin told his father that he wanted to marry someone else, his father basically went from, "What are you saying?" to, "I thought you wanted this!" to, "Okay, your wish, do whatever.", all in one sentence, one dialogue. Like, his father has some serious issues.

Honestly, I think the story served its purpose because it is a crack story through and through. But I felt like we needed more insight on some things that were summarised in just two-three sentences. The story definitely needs work, so that's all I have to say. Also, please make sure to follow the rules, and follow me.

If you have any questions, you may message the reviewer over PM or you may tag MochiSaysLachimolala in a comment here --->