Speak//Ashton Irwin

Chapter 4

Brooke:
I woke up to Ashton sitting up off the bed, causing it to dip, and making me roll onto my side.
"Sorry, did I wake you?" He said softly, grimacing.
I shook my head and sat up, rubbing my tired eyes. Ashton grinned.
"Liar. Anyway, your parents are coming over for dinner, so you don't have to go home yet. We're having barbecue. Again."
Grinning, I stretched my arms up, unlocking my muscles. I loved sitting out in Ashton's back garden eating barbecue food. Ashton's dad, always forgot about the smoldering food and wandering off, so we ended up having to smother it in ketchup and BBQ sauce to balance out the taste of burnt charcoal. It had become a tradition though.
"So, that guy at school today, Harry..." Ashton said, trailing off. He seemed unsure he should bring it up or not. Not, I thought. I shook my head, not wanting to think about Harry. There was only one day left at school. after that I wouldn't have to see him again for six weeks.
"Yeah, I know you don't want to talk about it, but it's tough. Does he do that a lot?" Ashton looked me in the eye. "We're doing this, Brooke, whether you like it or not. Does he hassle you a lot?"
Closing my eyes, I reluctantly nodded my head once. There was no point in trying to lie and assure him nothing was going on. He would know I was lying.
"I'm gonna kill him," he growled angrily. His body tensed up. My eyes snapped open and I shook my head, desperately pleading with him not to do anything stupid. Couldn't he see that it would just make things worse?
Ashton's face softened, the angry expression fell from his face.
"I'm sorry, Brooke. I just hate that people give you a hard time," he said tenderly. "I'll leave it, I promise. As long as he doesn't do anything like that again. You tell me if he does, okay?"
Sighing in relief, I laid my head on his shoulder. He immediately wrapped his arm around me and pulled me closer to his side. My heart started beating wildly as he rubbed circles on my arm with his thumb. I loved his touch. It didn't make me feel sick or scared. It was completely different, and I never wanted him to stop.
"Wanna watch a movie until dinner?" He asked as he picked up the remote and flicked through the channels. I nodded against his shoulder. I didn't really care what we did. I just wanted to be around him.
We stayed in Ashton's room, watching TV until we heard Anne call us down for dinner. I could have quite happily stayed in his room for the rest of the night, but I knew our parents would want us with them. I gulped as we walked downstairs and prepared myself to act normal.
"Finally. I'm starving," Ashton exclaimed.
I allowed myself to smile as he practically ran for the door. I followed him at my own pace. The second I got downstairs my mum greeted me. She pulled me into a hug and rubbed my back. She would often hug me like this when she knew I'd had a rubbish day. It was her way of trying to make everything better. A hug from mum fixed things when I was really little, but I hadn't felt safe like that in almost eleven years.
"Are you okay, honey? Anne said you both came home early," Mum whispered, stroking my hair. I pulled back to nod my head and smiled to convince her that I was all right. "Are you sure? Did someone do or say something to you?" She pressed further, her fingers squeezing my arm slightly. I shook my head and rolled my eyes, making her smile.
"Okay. You know you can come to me though, for anything." Again, I smiled to convince her.
"Good. Now, lets eat, eh?" I was pulled through Ashton's house by Mum tugging on my hand. Sometimes I thought she still saw me as a little girl. Like she thought I stopped aging when I had stopped talking.
I was ushered down into the seat next to Ashton. Ashton's dad was standing at the barbecue for a change. My brother, Louis, was talking to Lauren, Ashton's older sister. Well, he was bickering with her as usual. No doubt it would be something really stupid like 'Which tastes better, bacon or sausages?' He could make an argument out of anything.
Where was Dad?
I glanced over my shoulder, looking around the perfectly manicured back garden. He was nowhere to be seen.
Ashton waved his hand in front of my face, snapping me back to reality. "Hello! You okay?"
I nodded and grabbed a can of Coke from the table to have something to do, some distraction.
"About school," my dad's voice cut through everyone else's. I spun my head around to find him walking over to my side. "You can't just walk out like that. If someone's bullying you, then you need to let me know, and I will contact the school." I cracked open the can and nodded, looking down at the table. "I mean it, Brooke," he added sternly. His tone was harsh, but no one even looked up. To them it was just a concerned father telling his daughter off because he was worried about her.
So I didn't cause a scene or carry on the discussion, I nodded.
"Good girl. Now grab a plate, I think the food's ready." He kissed my forehead and went to take his seat next to Mum.
Thankfully, Ashton started talking to me about a class trip the seniors were taking to a theme park, and how he wished I were going too. I threw myself into listening to him and not dwelling on Dad being angry, but I didn't feel hungry anymore. I knew I should eat though, all I'd had today was ice cream, and Mum would start fussing if I didn't have a proper meal.
Ashton's dad placed a plate of burgers and sausages on the table. I took one of each and grabbed bread rolls. I forced myself to take a bite of my ketchup-smothered, charred hot dog.
"It's agreed then? Two weeks in Italy," Anne exclaimed, clapping her hands together. Italy? What had I missed?
"While you were off in Brooke land, we just planned the holiday," Ashton explained, reading my confused expression. Oh! That put a smile on my face. I felt my excitement build at the thought of going on holiday. Every year we went away with Ashton's family, and I loved every second of it.
"Italy," Mum confirmed, her face lighting up. She seemed excited too. I knew she loved spending time in foreign shops with Anne, or sitting by the pool gossiping.
Everybody else agreed, and I grinned. I couldn't wait to get away, to relax and hopefully forget everything for a week. Ashton winked at me, and I blushed. Oh, God, please say he didn't see me blush. Quickly looking away, and I fiddled with my fingers, feeling embarrassed. I did love the way he made me feel, but I didn't want him to know. We couldn't be together. I would never be good enough for him. He was perfect and I was broken.
Once we finished dinner, Ashton and I went back up to his room so I could watch Grey's Anatomy. We didn't have a program where we could record things because Dad complained that it was a rip off, them charging so much, so Ashton recorded the latest episode for me every single day. I could have just watched them when they were on, but my gymnastics classes clashed sometimes.
I settled on his bed and laid my head on his chest. His heart was beating steadily. The sound was so calming - like my very own lullaby.
"Whoa, bad show," Ashton called out, shaking his head at the TV. He hated the program so much that he made up a commentary on what was going on. I laughed at him, enjoying his stupid remarks.
"Brooke," he warned, glancing down. I pressed my lips together; my mouth ached when I tried to keep a serious face.
I gasped in surprise as he suddenly rolled us over, and moved over me. Oh, wow. He was hovering above me, his legs either side of mine as he pinned my hands over my head. I wasn't scared, not at all. There were no feelings of panic or dread. It felt... right.
"Are you sorry?" He half smiled and raised his eyebrows. My heart went crazy. I shook my head to play along. "Alright, you asked for it," he said with a shrug. His face became mischievous, eyes glistening and his face inched closer to mine.
"Brooke, your parents said it's time to go," Lauren shouted as she burst into the room. She gasped as she saw the position we were in. Her eyes were wide. I groaned internally.
"Actually, you know what? Why don't you two finish first?" She grinned. "I'll tell them you'll be a minute!"
Ashton pushed himself up off me and reached down the side of the bed for something. He threw one of his trainers at her, but she managed to jump out of the way before it hit her. "Shut up, Lauren," he growled.
Lauren laughed and stepped out of the room. I really hoped she wouldn't tell my parents about this. Not that we were even doing anything! I didn't want them to think anything was going on with Ashton because they probably wouldn't let us be alone together.
Without looking him in the eye, because my face was flaming in embarrassment, I quickly kissed his cheek and hopped off the bed.
Just as I got out of his door, I heard him sigh.
"Are you ready, sweetheart?" Mum asked, placing a protective arm around my waist as I entered the room. I didn't reply to her question because Dad stepped forward in front of me.
"Let's get you home. School tomorrow." He smiled and stroked his hand down the back of my head. I nodded in agreement and slipped past them both, giving a little wave to Ashton's parents as I headed to the front door.
"Thank you for tonight," Dad said to Ashton's Dad and Anne politely. "You'll have to come to ours soon."
"You're welcome, and you know we'd love to," Anne responded.
I took a deep breath and watched them exchange their goodbyes. It looked so normal, just friends thanking each other, making plans and saying goodbye. I was the only one that could see through it.
"Why does it take them ten minutes to say bye," My brother moaned, appearing at my side. Where had he been? I shrugged. They would say goodbye and then start another conversation. It went on like that for a while.
"We're leaving," Louis called loudly. Mum gave us a little wave in acknowledgement and went back to chatting about Dad's business, which, judging by the recent hushed phone conversations and his stressed outbursts, I guessed was in trouble.
I walked home with Louis. He hung back and walked at my pace. I could tell by the way he glanced over at me that he wanted me to hurry up, he was probably keen to get home so he could play computer games. "Shit." Louis cursed. "You got a key?"
I sighed in exasperation and shook my head. My key was in my school bag in Ashton's bedroom.
We both turned and looked back at Ashton's house just as our parents were walking along the path. Mum had my school bag over her shoulder. Thank God, I didn't have to go back and get it. I wasn't ready to see Ashton again.
Dad unlocked the door and let us in. "Make sure you do any work you missed today, Brooke," he instructed, nodding his head towards the bag Mum let slip off her shoulder.
I nodded and took it from her. I felt so tired from an extremely long day, and just needed to be out of the way, so I went straight to my room. Just as I snuggled under my thick puffy covers, my phone beeped with a text message. I knew it would be from Ashton. Not only was he the only person to text me apart from my parents and Louis, but he also sent me a message every night.
My stomach was fluttering as I opened the message. It said just one word, 'Night x' I loved the x. A kiss.
I hit reply and typed 'Goodnight x' but I didn't send it. I never sent them. Not ever. I saved the message in the outbox with all the others and sighed. My eyes filled with tears. I desperately wanted to reply to him, but I was too scared of where that might lead.