Hearts On The Line

Chapter six

Today is finally the day Jackson is going back. It's been a long week, but we made it through. Also, Tara is coming home tomorrow, and my work schedule will go back to somewhat normal. I'm actually looking forward to heading in today after I drop off the kids.

I lift my hand to knock when the door flies open. Jackson is ready to go, his black backpack perched on his shoulder, and his hair neatly brushed forward.

"I'm ready."

He strides past me and heads for the stairs. I watch him until he disappears, the front door opens, and closes with the sounds of Anna's footsteps running after him. Taking a few deep breaths, I head out to the car with them in hopes that it will be a good day. We had an okay weekend following the watch incident, last night though, he asked for it back, said he wanted to hold onto it. I was hesitant at first but gave it to him. If it helped him cope with his father's disappearance, I wasn't going to take that away.

"Mom?" Anna asks as we pull out of the driveway.

I allow my eyes to focus on them for a second before putting my attention back on the road.

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"The man in leather, Lawson, Henry's dad, did you kiss him?"

My foot drops hard on the break as we come to a halt at a stop sign.

"Did I what now?" I ask to make sure I've heard her.

"You know when two adults love each other they kiss. Like you and daddy used to..."

There's no car behind me, so I idle at the corner. Glancing back again, I look at Jackson. He's staring out the window, his thoughts seem to be far away.

I can feel the heat creeping up my neck and settling on my cheeks.

"I uh– I – it's –"

Jackson rolls his eyes. "Mom, you don't have to pretend, we aren't kids anymore."

I want to laugh at that statement, but instead my lips stay pressed tightly together. Someone honks, and I give the intersection one last glance before rolling through.

"Okay. Lawson and I are going on a date on Saturday. I was waiting to tell you both, but if you aren't comfortable, I won't do it."

My gaze lands on Jackson for a split second.

"I think it's amazing," Anna says, gushing.

"Thank you, sweetie. Jackson, I'll understand if you want me to call it off. It's not that–"

"Just go, ma," he says, not looking at me. His focus is still on the outside world.

My heart leaps from my chest. Does he really mean that? I wasn't expecting to have this conversation in the car. Although his voice sounds steady, I wish we were face to face so I could get a better idea of how he was feeling.

"Jackson, if you're-"

"Mom, I said it's fine. You should go. You're sad."

I blink away fresh tears. I haven't cried since Friday when we had the conversation about the watch, but now here I am about ready to bawl all over again. Kids pick up on everything. He's not wrong. It's been a while since I've felt true happiness. I've been living life on this autopilot mode since their dad left. Same routine, different day.

"Mommy does he give you tingles in your belly?" Anna asks.

A snort and a sob release at the same time. The wetness that clung to my eyes has escaped and is starting to fall down my cheeks.