The misunderstood hero and his frozen angel

Dark days revealed

Sivaangi was looking at the dark clouds when she heard footsteps. She was a little nervous but she knew she had to do it. She had always had her mom and dad with her during difficult times. She pulled out her phone to see the screen which was their family picture. She silently took their blessings and sighed. Ashwin had noticed that she had left her water bottle on the dining table so he brought it up to her knowing she will need it.

She smiled and said, "How are you so thoughtful, Achu. Naan pesina daagam edukkum ne therinju eduthuttu vandheenga. You are such a gem." He smiled and said, "adhu seri but namba venue va maathanum pola irukku. Paathiya, dark clouds, mazha vara pogudhu so deck la poi pesalaama?" She agreed and they walked out to the back yard. It was breezy and smelt like earth. They sat on the love seat there and she started, " Ashwiney ungalukku nyabagam irukka CWC celebration round la Neenga oru vishayam soneenga kindala. Naan sweet potato la thaan namba journey arambichudhu nu sonnappa Neenga adhoda mudichukalaam nu sonneega" even the thought of it made her shudder. He lifted her and placed her on his lap and wrapped her in a blanket.

Sivaangi continued, "namakulla nalla poittu irundhuchu but andha audio launch ku rendu naal munadi naal thaan purinjukaama sanda potten." She tried to control her tears and Ashwin just held her tighter kissing her shoulder. That encouraged her to go on, "Audio launch podhu Neenga en peru kooda solladhadhu naan romba hurt aanen but yaaru koodayum discuss panna mudila yenna yaaru ungala pathi thappa pesi naalum enakku thaanga mudiyadhu. So bathroom la poi azhuden. Next day that SK Anna kitta pesi Vijay sir meet panni happy ya ungalukku phone pannalaamnu...." Her voice started to choke and he held her closer. He cradled her like a baby.

"Appo thaan social media la ungala appidi attack panninaanga. Andha nimisham naan unga kitta odi vandhu ungala appidiye katti pudichukanum nu aasai patten. I wanted to be there to hold you while you were crumbling but you blocked me out of your life completely." This time she turned around and hugged him tight. She clearly was reliving it. Her body was shaking and she was whimpering like a child. His heart broke into million pieces seeing her like this. He cradled her and hugged her. He grabbed her water bottle and helped her take a few sips.

"Social Media la namba rendu perukkum avalo negativity. Adhukku ellam naan bother pannaley because I am used to it but this was new to you. I just wanted to let you know that it was all going to be ok but you completely shut me off from your life. Neenga enna block panni unga phone number kooda maathiteenga. I was completely broken. Neenga innime en life la illai nu andha moment la I had a mental breakdown down. The world could not find this out so I was put on anxiety medication. Appo nu paathu neraya events sign up panni I kept myself busy. I could not sleep so I had to take anti depressant. I was walking around like a zombie. Appo thaan one week oorukku poitten. Ennoda cousins evvalavo enna cheer up panna try paninnaga. Chennai vandha udane ennoda friends oru Pondicherry trip plan paninaanga. But I could not forget you. Nothing helped and the pain only got worse." She stopped to take a breath and Ashwin kissed her forehead. She did not realize that he was hiding his tears from her.

"Indha time la thaan naan seriya saapadaama thoongama I tested positive for Covid twice. Neenga illama sila time sethuralaama nu kooda feel ayirukku, Aswiney. Indha vishayam enga family ya thavuthu innum orey oru aalukuu thaan theriyum. Adhu thaan Punith anna. Aparam avar unga kitta pesina apparam thaan we reconciled again but andha one month la naan experience pannina pain ennoda enemy ku kooda varakoodadhu. Adhunaala thaan inniki Neenga kovil la appidi sonna podhu I relived that entire thing and lost control. I am so sorry ungala ellam kashtapaduthinadhukku."

Ashwin cupped her cheeks and said, "No kutty ma. Naan thaan sorry kekkanum. Naan unakku evvalo kashtam kuduthirukken. I did not want you to suffer with me but I have given you more pain by not including you. Nee illada andha days la thaan naan Unna evvalo love pannaren and un love evvalo strong num purinjukitten. Innime velayattukku kooda unna hurt panna maaten ma. Come what May, we will face it together ok? Nothing can break us anymore."

Sivaangi felt like she had finally let go of a huge burden. He held on to her like she was the most precious thing in the world. They sat their silently and the slowly Sivaangi said, "Ashwiney inniki unnoda Mottamaadi romance a keduthen la?" She looked at him and smiled mischievously. He nodded and said, "Yesterday you needed the physically intimate husband and today you needed a compassionate partner. This is romance too so no nee romance ellam kedukaley. Eppadi en madila ukkadhu irukkey paaru." She pecked his lips and then took it over passionately. It was her way of relaxing and letting go. That kiss was all they needed.

They will fly back to Chennai in the morning but this has been a memorable trip for several reasons. Their love evolved multiple folds during these three days and will keep evolving and growing.

Brinda Subramanian

I am not very satisfied with the way this turned out but being vulnerable in front of your partner is very essential for a bond to get stronger. Tell me what you think.